Forgive me sir Edgar Allen
Poe I must write this out because it's maddening
Me to no foreseeable end
I stand here, right noe, at ravens end.

I walked outside the chamber onto the Astral plane
And saw the thoughts, scribbles and pops that amounted in crowds insane
What was in my sight by no means plain
And I stood there, contemplating at ravens end.

An ebony bird flew onto my shoulder looking out at the subconscious murmurings gathered by the pink and gooey Boulder
He crowed loudly, silencing the ideas so I could speak
I shouted to them "FELLOW CITIZENS WE MUST OVER TAKE THE PEAK!"
"WE MUST SEARCH OUT AND RECLAIM WHAT MADE US UNIQUE!"
And the raven crowed again, it seemed as if it wished to speak.

Rousing the ideas were, and creativity flowed back into my head
Reactivating circutry that was once long dead
And outside the lab where I was laid to rest
A raven flew back home to his nest
He crowed loudly, so loud that one could hear what he had to say at the neighborhood store

And so I quote the raven... nevermore

I'd **** to be on the beach right now
No cares, no worries, sand gently blowing at my brow
Looking out at the clear blue sea
With an ice cold drink in the chair next to me
A tequila Sunrise would go well as the sun sets
Eyeballing the tanlines with slim to no regrets
Oh what I'd give to be on the beach right now
Gulls crowing overhead, the beauty of nature making me whisper quietly, wow.

My heart is an apocalypse
Empty
Dead and strange
Occasional signs of life
Constantly in strife
Fighting for survival in conditions so bitter
Although living in these conditions does create a kind of grit only found in wool sweaters

And to be honest I wish It was getting better
But it's not to be frank
My future seems to be like a sarcophagus, dark and dank
I wish I could find it in myself to love as much as stone cold Steve Austin drank

But My heart is an apocalypse
I can taste the tears on my lips
As you walk away
I can't see any reason that you would stay

It feels like I've downed about 3 shots because it's illogical unlike spock to let you back unbridled in my head I thought we were dead we were one at one time but to go back there we would need to rotate earth the other way around the sun because what we had was Russian Roulette using a howitzer as the gun because when it was great it was unstoppable but I'd give anything to get rid of these forget me nots so I can finally find peace on this chapter now I'm no rapper but I had to get all this off my chest because these verses are both cursed and blessed I guess I could make a gesture toward sanity but I couldn't be normal for the rest of my life...

I became your favorite obsession
I wondered if my last hour had come.
I am not alive until you called,
In an hour or two my cell phone becomes as hot as I am.
Take me, break me, I can’t be obedient,

I want to feel whole again…
without looking over my shoulder.
Oh my wounded and troubled heart
My soul is in deep anguish,
Without this forceful conquest

Within my eyes, jealousy wedge deep
Because of my self-critical thoughts,
My early rejections, my feeling, thoughts and action:

Our grandmother’s words came to be fulfilled
“An old fashion botheration,
   My indulgence from my past,
This led to an old fashion romance,
That wasn’t resolved then or now.

Take this kiss from my lip
And in return take off your glasses
and let me see your weary eyes
You are not wrong, my jealousy is a disease

If life had be kinder to us,
I would have been yours,
And you would have been mine.
I would have been the slave to you,

I stood by the window, and stare down at couples walking by
holding hands and I thought about them and I think about us:
Making further plans and I waved my hand to them
and smile because love is a lie.

heart of darkness encounter of lies
I have paid my dues, I settled my tithes.

How can I tell my heart to stop loving him?
I became his favorite obsession, now he’s mine
Take me, break me, I can’t be obedient,
I want to feel whole again, my friend

My wounded and troubled heart,
My soul is in deep anguish,
without this forceful conquest
So why do I weep in my sleep?

My God of refuge, what was the hidden truth?
I played with fire, and now I am burnt.