Day 1: I want to tear my skin off. My heart is beating so fast i can barley breathe. I feel so filthy.
Day 2: I can't believe this. I don't want to be here. Why did this happen? Why did I let this happen?
Day 5: I guess I drank too much and my friends were to drunk to stop me.
Day 10: I can't face my friends, I can't live my life.
Week 3: No one knows. He hasn't said a word.
Week 6: It happened again, I was sleeping and he did it again. Why did I stay the night? Why didn't I go straight home?
Week 7: He left and kissed me goodbye. I don't know how to feel.
Week 10: My life's out of control, I can't believe whats happening.
Month 5: My boyfriend knows. But not all details. Just thinking about it, makes me want to take a shower.
Month 8: I finally came clean to my friends. They're appalled. They hate him now. I still feel filthy. I can't get his smell off my body still.
Month 11: The anniversary is soon. What am I going to do?
Year 1: I haven't spoken to him in months. I haven't thought about it in days. I still feel as if hes on top of me, why can't I wash him away?

Its an uphill battle with myself and others. Some days I can't get out of bed or even feel like breathing.
But I try not to let him get to me. Because if he sees my weakness from what hes done,
He's won.

My body
Is carved
From sticks and stones
As they say
But words
Shall never hurt me.
I was filth,
*****
From past words named to me.
But what he didint
Know
I wasn't his
***,
I was a princess.
A tone,
And hue of
What he missed.

Simply this,
He missed
Out on what goodness
He could have had
A loyal girl,
A sènora
Who was beyond his
Wildest imagination!
Beyond any other woman
Or grab!

Everyone has an idea of a person that is perfect for them,
How they look,
How they act,
Seldom do people truly find this person,
For me, my perfect girl is a shorter blonde,
Blue eyes that would light up the room,
A body that is neither thin nor fat,
A girl that makes good decisions,,
Perhaps a smart girl,
Smart enough to make me wrong sometimes,
I've never seen this girl I speak of,
But I found someone better,
You don't fit a single thing I just said,
Get okay grades in school,
You have black hair and auburn eyes,
You make me feel crazy in silence that you create,
Yet I still have loved you more than anyone,
More than my life it's self in which I'd give to you in a moment,
You've surpassed my expectations,
While not meeting a single one,
But I love you and always will,
Even if you hurt me I will love you.

We're all mirrors in our fragile states
Enough pressure against us, our surfaces
Cause cracks across our faces
Some have shattered beneath
Shards of us fall to the ground
Mirror, mirror on the wall
Who's the most broken among us all?

This is the end
I am done playing pretend
I will lay this out so you understand that you caused me a dent.
I wanted to support you til the end
I gave you my heart with no strings attached
All you did is take my heart and rip it to pieces
You shout at me as if I am another man who is worthless as hell
You put other people above me although you tell me you are my best friend
I am done believing a story that you tell but never prove it at the end
You told me something that no one has ever said you said you would never change  even if it ment I leave
Have you thought once what that means
Do I mean anything or am I just some one to use as a mop to clean
Anyways Olga this is something I say to you as a goodbye to you
I wanted you like the flower needs the water to live
You used my love to break me down
As I see you for the last time I want to say I wanted you to be with me for the rest of my life.
But now I feel we should part away and live our seprate ways.
As you will never change and I wouldn't bare getting hurt again