I was dying
They would probably think I was lying
But I was busy not crying
I really thought they weren't buying those very real tears
The pain was and started amplifying
I was really just wondering if I needed to be clarifying

Im scared of the people I see everyday
I’m afraid of a closed door
I never want to wonder, what would happen
If I even once, dared to knock

For what I have, are no broken bones
But I’ve always been crawling
I do have two lungs
But I still always have trouble breathing

This heartbeat of mine is staggering
When I make mistakes or do wrong by my own book
It tells me to bang my head through the wall
For wrong doings only deserve pain
Therefore I’m even scared of my own house
The people out there, how do they exist so calmly?
I’m a wreck as soon as I walk out the door

I can’t seem to explain - mostly because I don’t understand it myself

I didn’t mean to be so quiet
I didn’t mean to be so gone
I didn’t mean to be so scared
I didn’t mean to be so sad

If I could be easy to talk to, I would be
If I could forget my past, I would in a second
If I could not be so timid, I would
If I could understand, I would

If I could escape anxiety, i would probably be forever running.

They take death so lightly and life even lighter
Crushing a bone or two is the same as the flu.
Dancing with the hangman at the spring ball
Take the gate keeper, for its less formal For what is a soul to gamble
When all somebody has for a light is a melted candle
Maybe I was to hasty to fix
For all we know
She was the one with all the trix

The tangler left all the knots untied
Maybe it’s tired of being uncomfortable and uncontrollable
Here we don’t need tweezers in our pockets
Because our now free tears, fall anyway
We got tips and tricks, flee or sow
Hear or tear to the rainy hair that cling to our shoulders
Hugging tightly till we gasp for air and start reaching for the surface