sometimes I want to throw up
but nothing ever comes up

I get this horrible feeling
I can't change or make it go away

I hate myself for all my mistakes
the decisions I've made

it hurts to know
it hurts to tell

Your soul
A cabin as it should
Surrounded by forgiving trees
And friendly fern laid paths beneath
Your sound
And sound is that of thrushes knocking
Cattails waiving friends goodbyes
With summers long once gone to rest
In other counties
I'm glad you tried
To keep that hymnal you alive

In my country you did belong

I LIKE TO SAY YOUR NAME

I like to say
your name

when you're
not here

turn you
into sound

conjure you out of
thin air

so that you appear
before me

dressed in sound
only

memory sketching in
the rest of you

as if sound
was just an outline

and love
colours you in

adding the voice last
so I can hear you say.

"Hello you..!"
and there you are

as present
as present

can be.

I like to say
your name

when you're
not there.