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Do you remember
The first time you held somebody's hand
Felt the way their skin pulsed against yours
How your heart attempted to escape from your chest
And your stomach became home to 10 million moths
Flying into the light all at once
Do you remember
The nervous laughs
And the smile that lay between pigmented cheeks
Drawn from admiration
And bliss
How you never before found glow
In a lantern not your own
Do you remember
The lips that first wiped you of your sanity
How they brushed against yours with  seemingly perfect unision
Replayed over and over again
Heart reminding brain
Reminding body
How good it felt to be loved
To be touched
If that could be bottled
If any of the first time nostalgia and discovery
Could be placed in a glass jar
And preserved
Than we would need no reminder
Of how it felt to feel
And how it felt to be
Alive.
 Jul 2014 Marley Jane
Chris Arias
Vulnerable blue veins lurking beneath pale skin.
Longing, begging, pleading
to be opened,
to be spilled,
Lies and heartache released,
peace and silence gained.
Deeper, farther, less afraid,
one step closer
From temporary release
to eternal silence.

Trembling hands.
Shallow breaths.
Heartbeat.
Thud.
Thud.
Thud
Silence is so near,
So simple,
but so
permanent.

Ready,    
but hesitant.
Longing to go,
but needing to stay.
A constant internal war.
Do it.
I can’t
Stop it.
I won’t
End it.
no
No!
Never.

Exhale.
Fear seeps through,
slow at first, but then all at once.
Realization creeps through.
Horror dawns.
Disgust arrives.
Self hatred.
but
A glimmer of relief.
Breath.
Still here.
Heart.
Still beating.
Thud.
Thud.
Thud.
Still
**Alive.
My pap saw ghosts
The night he died.
I stood in his old boots
One year later, and learned
A subtle love of power
With fire, fire, *fire
 Jul 2014 Marley Jane
C. S. Lewis
Angelic minds, they say, by simple intelligence
Behold the Forms of nature. They discern
Unerringly the Archtypes, all the verities
Which mortals lack or indirectly learn.
Transparent in primordial truth, unvarying,
Pure Earthness and right Stonehood from their clear,
High eminence are seen; unveiled, the seminal
Huge Principles appear.

The Tree-ness of the tree they know-the meaning of
Arboreal life, how from earth's salty lap
The solar beam uplifts it; all the holiness
Enacted by leaves' fall and rising sap;

But never an angel knows the knife-edged severance
Of sun from shadow where the trees begin,
The blessed cool at every pore caressing us
-An angel has no skin.

They see the Form of Air; but mortals breathing it
Drink the whole summer down into the breast.
The lavish pinks, the field new-mown, the ravishing
Sea-smells, the wood-fire smoke that whispers Rest.
The tremor on the rippled pool of memory
That from each smell in widening circles goes,
The pleasure and the pang --can angels measure it?
An angel has no nose.

The nourishing of life, and how it flourishes
On death, and why, they utterly know; but not
The hill-born, earthy spring, the dark cold bilberries.
The ripe peach from the southern wall still hot
Full-bellied tankards foamy-topped, the delicate
Half-lyric lamb, a new loaf's billowy curves,
Nor porridge, nor the tingling taste of oranges.
—An angel has no nerves.

Far richer they! I know the senses' witchery
Guards us like air, from heavens too big to see;
Imminent death to man that barb'd sublimity
And dazzling edge of beauty unsheathed would be.
Yet here, within this tiny, charmed interior,
This parlour of the brain, their Maker shares
With living men some secrets in a privacy
Forever ours, not theirs.
Serpentine corpuscles trickle to his chin
as they batter him in incensed anger's blow
but couldn't they break the broken man within
the sinner long used to seeing own blood's flow!

**** him the frenzied crowd storms over him
ceaseless punches fall like moribund rain
insane monsters' boiling wrath's steam
would stop only when is numbed all his pain!

His meek hands vainly struggle to defend
cracked bones clang like splintered glass
head bows then curves in crumbled bend
till his frame yields to the merciless mass!

Be scared not he has died thus in the past
repaired revived and released from cell
every time coming back in renewed lust
to walk once again through the fire of hell!
When I am dead, my dearest,
    Sing no sad songs for me;
Plant thou no roses at my head,
    Nor shady cypress tree:
Be the green grass above me
    With showers and dewdrops wet;
And if thou wilt, remember,
    And if thou wilt, forget.

I shall not see the shadows,
    I shall not feel the rain;
I shall not hear the nightingale
    Sing on, as if in pain:
And dreaming through the twilight
    That doth not rise nor set,
Haply I may remember,
    And haply may forget.
I love the Seasons:
The luminescent sproutings,
The melt, the harlequin winds
And knee-deep sun.
I'm not in love with the Seasons.

I love the Beach:
The watusi to the shore
Where foreign waves
Lapdance my tired feet.
I'm not in love with the Beach.

I love a BBQ:
The fingered smells
In my nose,
The breaking of bread,
The leaning laughing heads,
The icy throats, and ants.
I'm not in love with BBQ's.

I love a Concert:
The M & M  crowd,
The swarm of fireflies waving,
The ka-boom,
The expectant memories.
I'm not in love with a Concert.

I love a good Ride
That parts my hair,
Pushes my cheeks, nut-like
As my Shadow drags the median.
I'm not in love with a good Ride.

I love the Holidays,
Wrapped and bound.
The gathering storm;
The smell of wax and cold mail
Of cards that say little,
But mean everything.
I'm not in love with the Holidays.

I love my House,
Every web and peel,
Dripping faucet and warm fire.
I love the honey-do list.
I'm not in love with my House.

You, I love for all the wrong reasons.
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