Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
  May 2015 Livingdeadgirl
ahmo
Green eyes
and velvet pastures
just weren't enough.

My greatest surmise
is that faucets
just didn't emit the right temperature.

The puzzle pieces
were just some false expenditure-
some meaningless adventure.

I don't know why roses sting.
There's just always a reason
to ignore the sun.
He—
Her ginger.
Limp handshake.
Cacophonous  laugh.
Features, disproportionate.
In most ways- narrow minded.
Exceedingly self-assured.
Without money he is
No better than I.
Loving she:
Always.
-Me


Yet
here I stand.
Clinging to the bottle.
Watching the years pass by.
Alone atop this cold, cobble, stoop;
Coat covered in cigarette ash.
I don’t think of  you—
or  at  least  I
try  not
to.


Not
quite dead…
However, not entirely
alive either. And I made a sincere
effort to climb out of the plot you left me in;
but darling that hole you dug me was  ******* deep!
And the only tool you’d left me was that ****
bottle; which for a short while helped.
Until eventually, like you,
it consumed
me.
    
  
Now
I  awaken,
only to find that I’m
no longer capable of feeling;
and what a great disappointment this
is to me. It would seem as though my receptors,
synapses, neurotransmitters, etc- have flickered and fried.
Dopamine, will no longer travel within these
useless,  dried-up,  old veins of mine.
Evidently my demise, resultant
of a life lived alone
in a faster
lane.
Its been a long time since I've written something that I'm this happy with. I hope everyone enjoys reading this piece as much as I enjoyed writing it.

-Christopher K.D.
Shirtless, barefoot, and
reeking of self-loathe;
he sat in silence
at the edge of his mattress.
Studying the black
lettering on the face of
the prescription bottle
through bloodshot eyes.
His name indicated in bold
just above the RX number.

Aloud he read the words
Amphetamine Salts
To the layman- adderall:
A quick fix for your
run of the mill '*****-up'.
But to him it meant yet
another night without sleep.
One more night away from his demons.
Without the crippling nightmares;
The reoccurring remembrance
of events no longer (if even ever)
within his immediate control.
Glancing over at the clock-
counting quickly on fingers,
he’d figured it’d been about
sixty-four hours since his last sleep.

The lack of rest accompanied by
excessive alcohol consumption,
was making things hazy.
Days bled into one another.
His eyes started playing tricks.
Now sitting up straight,
he applied pressure to the
childproof lid, and twisted.
Plunging his fingers into the bottle,
removing two more pills,
he held them for a moment—
Then, with the help of a
flat, warm, beer swallowed
another twelve guaranteed
hours without sleep.

Laying back, legs hanging
off the edge of the bed
muscles aching,
stomach growling,
eyeballs burning;
content in knowing
he'd die before ever
facing that dream again.
I like to think
you could love me;
scars, bruises, and  all.
Every notion of your being;
the charcoal that feeds this flame.
Pulsing. Radiant. Throwing  heat  from
thick  cast  iron  walls—  my  heart:
Cellar­-ridden,  half concealed.
Juvenile-  petty in nature.
Still, capable  of  love.
Of this, I am certain.
Regardless, I can
never offer the
love that you
deserve...
  May 2015 Livingdeadgirl
Awesomeness
As she sits in her room with the lights off,
she thinks about all the names she's been called,
geek, lame, ****, ******, stupid, lonely she cant take it no more
she gets her knife out and starts slitting.

she slits and slits until she goes to her other arm, she does a deep slit straight up and down while she still has the time,
she writes a note for her family,

"Dear family,
I'm sorry but i couldn't take it no more the name calling the punching, kicking and screaming. Every time you asked me if I was okay I replied with 'I'm just tired'. and you believed it. You never saw the tears in my eyes, you never knew how many times i cried myself to sleep, and you'll never know now. Tell Jess I love him. I love you guys too.
Goodbye."

Then she lays there on her floor dead.
  May 2015 Livingdeadgirl
Awesomeness
They went to school, They went to work.
I sit here alone waiting till they get home I get a text saying
"Your and idiot!! Go **** yourself."
I thought of how i already get bullied enough,
I can't take it. I get the chair and rope I hid in my closet,
I hang the rope from the ceiling fan, and make a video.
I am saying how horrible my life is and that I am just a waste of flesh,
I get up on the chair and put the rope around my neck,
I lip sync "Goodbye." as a kick the chair out from under me.
I died instantly.
Next page