I feel honour bound to break beautiful things.
Everything looks like it's made of glass,
Crystalline and calm and steady.
Until, that is, you move it.
I think in this moment, I am made of glass.
I could have been beautiful,
But I have never been calm,
Or steady.

I want to break myself.

I am reading the title of this,
And I am crying.

It'd be so nice, for my mother
To look at me

And think of how amazing
I am to be.

But instead, she looks at me
Like this.

Imagine if instead of counting up,
We counted down.

We counted down, were
Issued a number of days.

And it would start in the thousands,
Until one day you noticed.

It was in the hundreds,
Where have the days gone?

You thought you had so many;
Now there's only one.

When I am falling down,
You will pick me up,
As we rise again, we miss the floor,
We rise above it all.
You came for me,
Healed my heart with kind words
And taught me how to fly.
I love you.

I will walk down a road someday,
In a city, or a village, or some country lane,
And I will no longer look behind me.
I will know the brick colour,
Of my house and the one next door,
But I will remember, that this place,
This home of mine, was new to me
And you, once.
Once, we were travellers.

"In order to be normal, break your walls,
Let people in, let them help."

*Alternatively, earn my trust, I'll show
You where the door is.

We're all so cute and sweet.
"I would never hurt you."
"You're my friend, why would I do that?"
You can't not hurt me,
It's what people do.
I don't want to be spared from
The pain of caring for you.
I tied myself down to you,
And let you whip me with the words
I fed you.
So don't lie to me and say
You would never hurt me
Because I know you will.
I do not, however, know that
You will pick up the pieces
Of my broken mind, and put
Me back together, that I might
Pretend
I won't be hurt by you again.

I am so tired of loud things;
Cars, bikes, wind, rain,
silence.
The loudest of them all
Is the deafening scream
Of someone too scared
To talk.

Broken hearts,
Broken fingers,
Broken minds.
Broken ribs and broken
Noses and broken *******
People in every place I look.

My hands are in the air, beautiful boy.
Do as you will, I am yours.
Any power I'd ever had was an illusion
So choke me on my own naivety
And bring me to a perfect surrender.

Never forget the days you're surrounded by happy people,
They matter as much as the days you're surrounded by the sad.

All these things we are scared to ask;
Can i kiss you?
Are you okay?
Do you want me to go?
We constantly hope for the answers
To form from dust and tears,
But they never do.

This is supposed to be a poem,
Ill get round to it..

There are things I owe to people,
Which I will never repay,
So I will do my best by you,
And settle this debt each day.

We are crying into the
Echos of nothing,
Shattering things that
Were never whole.
Drink from your
Broken glass, my dear
And pray the shards
Don't cut.

For a moment, I was sure you were going to die,
But I thought back on all I'd said to you.
All the things that mattered;
Your hands curling my arm in your sleep,
The sleepy kisses that followed.
You playing guitar and looking over at me in the moment I looked at you,
Your helpless face as you dream,
Splayed out and sighing.
And some moments that I shall never share.


I said I love you too many times today,
But in that moment
Where I thought you were going to die,
I was so glad for my tendency to repeat things.
*I love you.

Family,
Friends,
Lover,
Sister,
Mother and
Father,
My dear.

Christopher.
Bella.
Ross.
Jem.
Heather.
Ellen.
Alice.

We stand on ants,
We pinch and punch in the playground,
We kick and claw in alleyways,
Slap and bite in the bedroom.
Guns and bombs and knives,
We're all killers,
We're all cursed.

The justice you do at the seat of a piano.

There is so much I don't know,
So much I am unwilling to learn.
I won't understand,
Will never try to understand
Why people hurt each other.

Cowering in the corner
Of the chaotic chasm of time.
I fear the future, the promise
Of tomorrows.

We are surrounded by humanity in this bus. We are breathing one another in and yet out eyes are glued to our screens and our minds are drowning in utter crap. We consider it to be socializing if the other person is typing. I suppose it is in a way, but nothing will ever compensate for the touch of a hand or the real, unaltered laugh of a relative stranger because they could become a friend. It breaks my heart to see so many people absorbed by technology rather than a decent conversation. Yes I am aware I'm a hypocrite because I am typing this, but how else may I get it across to the rest of the world? We can't all read the same piece of paper...

The way you dance through the leaves
Of seasons, of time.
You are gliding, ripping up a dust of
Petals and Amber trees.
Give yourself the credit you deserve.
All these leaves are beautiful,
But you make them swirl and swarm.

The never ending inferno of chaos
And heat.
That we need to survive and thrive.
There are fires within us, combustion
And flames
To fill the hollow, to bring us warmth.

We needs goodbyes,
To write hello
On a new life,
A new dimension.

It finds us all in the end, doesn't it?

It's pulsing against the back of my throat,
The desire to scream the emotion away.
I cannot, I will not. This is my problem.
I can't.
I can't.
I can't.

I try to shout,
But it's just a breathe.
Take another,
Then a other;
Easy right?
*calm.

You are the sky I didn't know
I needed,
Raising and falling each day
And night.
With your nose in my hair
As you sigh in your sleep
And I am so **** lucky
You are mine to keep.

I am never going to be enough for you, honey.
Your arms are going to scar, and my heart
Is going to break,
Over and over and over again,
Because I can't take away your pain.

The first boy I thought I loved,
Kissed my unbroken heart
Until I bled my blues
And I slept in a kiss

But he broke up with me
For *minecraft.

With all this obsession about
Protecting youths from the world,
We forget that they too can hold
Guns and blades
Up to their own throats.

Nothing will ever do you justice.

Noose.**

It's almost like our friendship
Is hanging from a thread
And both of us have scissors
But instead of cutting the string,
We're slicing at our minds instead.

Breathing feels like breaking.

People keep forgetting
About those who
Are left behind.
Stop glorifying something
That makes those
Who cared feel
Like they did
Something wrong by
Going to sleep
While their friend,
Or lover or
Parent or sibling
Took pills in
The bathroom or
Jumped and fled
From the only
Life they were
Going to get.