You have turned me into a romance novelist
Thinking up these sappy fantasies
Forcing me to finally have a heart
Daydreaming of you and me.

You saw through my cold, hard wall
And knew that it was merely glass.
You tore it down with the things that you do
Making it a shadow of the past.

You have turned me into a late-night musician
Putting Sir Elton John to shame
Awake into the wee hours of the morning
Writing love songs titled in your name.

You did not believe a word I said
When I said I did not believe in love
You swept me away with all that you are
Leaving the angels smiling above.

You have turned me into a believer of miracles
Smiling at how my life has changed.
Making me believe you were heaven-sent
A wondrous marvel unexplained.

You are my half that I never foresaw
The epilogue I skipped in my ignorance.
But you have made me new with the way that you breathe
And you, my love, have made every difference.

I'm trying to fill a cavernous gap within my heart.
I think it's leaking from the bottom; I was finished from the start.
Liquor and cigarettes just slip out between the gaps.
I keep on trying but the effort's insufficient in comparison to what I lack.

I'll carry onward I'm a man and I know my roll,
but I'm running out of fire, I'm alone and it's getting cold.
I'll keep on drinking and smoking, pathetic attempt to fill the space;
But I'm not going anywhere, feels like I'm running in place.

Maybe the whiskey kills me, I think that'd be just fine.
Either way the cigarettes will kick in after time.
I know I could use a little help in filling up the holes,
but everybody dies alone; at least that's what I'm told.

I've been burning cigarette incense to ward off the hunger spirits
I've been drinking pure poison to try to **** the butterflies in my stomach
I've been relying on saying cheap cliches and terse, trite platitudes to avoid speaking of how I really am
I've been trying to stitch words together to make constellations or at least to make sense of everything or anything

I've been sleeping in the oddest of places if at all
I've been aching
I've been wasting money and myself


I've been better than this.

Six months ago
      Your soul filled mine
      I could listen to notes
      Without any sign
      Of the death warrant I wrote

Six months later
       Anger fills my veins
       Tears fill my eyes
       I am no longer sane
       I am my own demise

Six months later
       My heart contains pain
       My hand contains a knife
       My attempts were in vain
       My love ended in strife

Six months later
       These pictures bring back memoirs
       These memories bring up thoughts
       These thoughts bring up scars
       These scars; who i sought.

Six months ago*
         Trouble was not the intent
         Tears were not my goal
         Loyalty is what I meant

But six months later                              
          I am no longer whole

In these closely quarter's called apartments....
There's a porch right next to me
Third floor

There is a man named Anthony
Thirties in age or so,
Mine neighbor girl is who he's friends with
Yet friends he doth not seeketh....

He doth not liveth here
Yet myswell sayeth he doth...

The girl next to me
Dallas ( her name)
Isn't with Anthony
( as I said) just friends....
But I just saw Dallas bring over a guy friend...

As Anthony's outside taking a hit of his light drag in hurtful motion....

I canst seeith the pain that holds his face up
Like a lantern to a flame....
I seeith his hearts enflamed...

Though knowing him and Dallas art ust friend's..  
What canst the man do?

As I seeith him take a heavied puff
Blowing out all of his pains through the tobacco misty....

I seeith he dreaded going back inside
As his heart was screaming
( GET OUT, SHES MINE *****)
He kept his head hung low

As if going to the gallows.....