I watched the control slowly slip out of my grip,
Life slip out of my hands.
I could feel the weight of overthinking while trying to quit.
Stay clean.

But self harm gave me control,
So what is it really?

At least the sunset is pretty,
The way i want to be.
At least it shines with warmth,
Instead of cold stares i recieve,
But it'll end,
Disappear,
Leave me like they all did,
And my life will end with the sunset,
In the last rays of its warmth.

Why would you lie to me,
Knowing i would believe?
You told me you would stay
While i saw you leave,

I wish i knew what went through your head,
When you said you wished one day you'd see me dead,
That one day i'd stop breathing,

But still, i kept believing
That one day you would come back,
That the lock on your heart
Would finally crack

And eventually break,
That i'll hear you say it was all fake,
But when that happens, i'll already be dead,
You said that you would love me,
I died a failure instead.