I sleep less now
than I did before
Hear rapid tapping
At my door
The sounds of violence
Keep pushing me
To want to leave you
Here in peace.
I come downstairs
Hold to the railing
I want to fall
But fear the waking.
Plates smashed on the floor
Blood spilled on the floor
You lay on all fours
And call her a *****
You say she's a *****
Tell me not to swear
And clean up all this ****.
I lost my temper that day
Or night should I say
Too early to tell
Or too late for this hell.
I want to leave here
I've just had enough
Of this mess
Don't blame me for this
My actions are mine
But the cause is all yours.

Look back now and reminisce
Do you remember her first kiss?
It was sweet to see her blush
To touch the lips of her first crush.

With no thoughts on her brain,
About deep life so full of pain,
Where she will sleep
How there will be no food to eat.

So she looks back now
and she remembers how
She was so happy way back when
She didn't have to sleep with men.

When she was hungry,
Don't forsake her
It's not her fault
She couldn't make it.

She may have let you down but know this
You will always be her closest
You were the one that she adored
And the one for who she ******.

We all knew her for what she was
She was bright, she was happy
Until she forced herself
To live a life for someone else.

I can't stop thinking about you.

You have beautiful eyes
I just wish I could express it better.
I'd put my hand on your thighs
But I can't find the confidence.
I'd call you up and tell you how I feel
If I just asked you for your number.
I want to take you out for a meal
But I can't tell you.
You walk by me everyday
But you don't know me.
You wouldn't talk to me, you wouldn't hold me.

Poetry isn't my strong suit so I write this and force the rhyme because without it I'll be told that it's not a poem, just pointless prose. The poems I write will not get noticed, I won't be thrown a rose. See that last line? It wasn't needed but I added it to make things rhyme.

I'm stabbed by the stares you never give me
But not really.
I like symmetry but this is irregular
to symbolise how I feel about her.
Self reflexive poetry is odd
why read something that keeps you where you are?

You want to go on a journey don't you?
You want me to take you
To make you, dream
To carry your thoughts to a place away
From where you are
Through the clouds, through the stars
Yeah, look up, there you are.
But I won't. You're not there.
You are here. Always near
Full of fear, full of doubt
Choose a car. Choose a house.
Live this life
Make it count.
Don't write plays. Don't smoke ***
Don't say hot, don't say gay
You offend. Walk away.
It's your fault, it's not me.
I'm alone. Am I free?
I don't know any more.
She's a *****!
She's a *****!
I have time!
Make me rich!
Live for now!
For the day!
Carpe Diem!
Always say that you're mine!
Who is she?
Is she better?
Don't you love me?
Where's MY letter?
Where's MY ring?
Where's MY child?
Where's MY kitchen?
Where's MY car?
Where's MY life?
Where's the money?
I'm YOUR wife!
You don't love me!
Get out now!
Walk away!
Start again.
I won't stay.

I took time and took your troubles, left you alone all in your bubble. You wanted this you always said, you wanted me inside your bed with a house with a kid, you and me "ride or die" remember that? Of course not! That's why I'm never home. That's why I feel alone. That's why I drown my pain, I numb my brain and make it count, to take the bills off my account. I create chaos to create excitement. I've lost all time stuck in this system. I sit at home, I look at you, I read my books then start anew.

I can't look at her.
She's all alone,
She's in my arms,
She's in my home,
She's got a man
And so do I.
We know all this.
"It's just our life" We stare and say.
I've had enough!
I want a divorce!

...

We aren't together
Ironic, right?
We'd never love. We'd always fight.
And now we've lost all time.

He loved me and I knew it but the life we led, led him to do it.
She loved me when I was younger, when we were anxious, full of hunger.
We hung each other from the fan.
As life as in death, two separate souls in harmony. Woman and man.

I talk too much
When I'm alone.

From that day
To when I write this.

I wanted a lot more
Than what we had.

But now it's gone
Sadly, it's gone.

Papers thrown around
Like autumn leaves
Showing me bound
To fail like clumsy thieves.

Writings on the wall
With cliché phrases like the last
Show how I'll fall
That's just looking from the past

I don't want this, it isn't me
All I ever wanted to be is be free.

A man sits in his boat alone
And yields no riches from the river
so he is lost on what to do
until he sees a fisher.

This fisher brags his perfect catch.
"This fish looks far too big for YOU to catch"

The fisher then gives a reply:
"I'm offended that you think that but I shall help you"
The fisher gives the man a net to try.
He says:

"This net is only a tool, you cannot use anything but your own strength if you want to catch the perfect fish"
The man thanks the fisher for his help in accomplishing his wish.
Days go past with no results for the man with the net.

He meets with the fisher from time to time
each time the fisher tells him that only his own strength will help him catch what he says: "Is mine".
In all this talk, the fisher's perfect fish escapes.

The fisher is devastated.
The fisher is wrecked.
"How could I have let her go?!"
The man sees despair in his friend's losing his perfect.

The fisher and the man now sit alone along the shore.
They sit with their nets in the water.
No words are spoken.
No support because they are both broken.

The man then sees the fish that the fisher lost.
He knows the fisher begins to miss her
And uses this loss.

The man runs out, he tries to catch her.
He tries to take what the fisher once lost.
To take from a man he calls 'brother'.

The fisher is betrayed.
The fisher sees the desperate man.
The fisher moves away.

Because only a thief steals
what his brother loves
A brother never tries to steal
The only love a brother has.

I can't write well enough to be heard
Through all this noise. This ****.
I won't write well enough to break through
And make you pay attention to it.

The one you want to see you never does
And the ones you want to help never do
Because they are their own
And their own never want to.

I'm not well enough to get through to you
how not well enough I am.
I'll give up on this poem before the end
and you can observe the silence of this lamb.

I am not well enough.
I am too still.
My end is slowly coming.
Observe me and

Imagine for me, with all your thought,
This place where we both sit,
Where we share in tender moments,
Long gone, forgotten, in the past
And now believe for me. This place is real,
That it exists and you and I can both be here.
Make it a fact that we are close and always will be near
And do this once again,
For when you find your new lover
All thoughts of me will disappear.