He was a new teenager
Went to the middle school down the road
From our decaying house that was below a great oak tree
Early red sky morning, riding his bike to that construction filled Hell
There wasn't a sailor in sight to give him a needed warning of that reckless car
He was hit, ****** and bruised but he was alright
I was only 6 when I saw him get patched up by mother in our bathroom
I was only 6 when I realized who I wanted to be
But my first realization wasn't my last
That new teenager became an adult 5 years later
Went to the community college down the road
From his grandfather's rustic house that was just like everyone else's
9 a.m., blue sky morning, riding his bike because his nearly blind eye kept him off the road
9 a.m., I wish he had sight in that eye, he would've had a warning of that reckless car
He was hit, ****** and bruised but he was alright
I was only 12 when I saw him take cat scans and MRI's
I was only 12 when he was diagnosed with something I only read in medical articles
I was only 12 when I realized who I wanted to be
Joseph Yodsnukis was his name, but we called him J.J. since I was born
I learned the alphabet at my elementary and I said J twice because of that name
I learned after 8th grade that cancer was ruthless
I was only 14 when I held my mother crying
I was only 14 when I saw a hospice bed roll out of my front door
I was only 14 when I saw him in his casket
I swear I saw him breathing
I was only 14 when I realized his name wouldn't cut my lips again
I was only 14 when I realized who I wanted to be
Who I would live for
Poem dedicated to my late brother, J.J.
R.I.P.