Nobody is here
To talk
Nobody is near
To walk
Emotions running wild
Nowhere to be
Anything but mild
Going crazy
Panicking, no air
My lungs are broken
Nothing there
I'm empty.

i still havent figured out the greatest answer
the things ive seen
i dont know really
i dont
and is that why im still here?
because i always did
and i always will

know scars from depths and heavens lashings
felt coal and fought the demons pleading
been starving cold and hungry
been all alone
ive been alone
but i know the way the season changes
i know cherry blossoms and sweetest honey
taste the nectar of my eternal spring
i felt love
of the way the sunrises

pyramids
slow down
find the reason why

i had a talk with myself the other day
i told myself to be strong
like i was before
like i am all along
and that even this pain will be something
i laugh at

Maintain your tenacity
And do not fall apart
Keep your mind sharp
Right from the start
Knowledge is there
Just reach out and grab it
Continue to learn
That is the spirit

his hands were touching me so
softly
and somehow my lips
touched his
and his hands were down my pants
and his teeth were on my neck
and my moans were in his ear

but I knew he wasn't
you

Standing for nothing….
  falling for everything

Time becomes your master
  each moment—zero sum

(Villanova Pennsylvania: June, 2018)

The only thing I need
Right in this moment
Is someone's eyes on me
Saying I'm fine
This weather scares me
The storm and I
Are about to break

I haven’t tidied in a while.

Clothes coat my floor in a strategic mayhem; makeup rocks on its side, contents slowly seeping out.
Medication lays scattered, dots of colour in the ocean of obsidian.

I think I see you in the madness.
Your essence.
One of the last places you breathed in.

Maybe I think that when I clear away the buried floor, I will find you beneath the fabric.