plans wait
for
no man.
                            
- g.w

it's 2am and across the street a dog is barking. i'm staring so hard into my keyboard that it begins to blur. i am thinking. the room is empty. and near pitch black but there is light peeking through the blinds. i am almost as still as the objects here except my cigarette stained lungs keep moving. sometimes i forget to breathe. sometimes is usually. don't forget to breathe, my daddy once told me.

*i wish i would stop forever.

Today I was free. I didn't feel the need to want you or see your face. I didn't need you to give me that reassuring smile.

I let go. Completely.
I got a chance to breathe and I was no longer enclosed from anything like I was when you mattered.
I realised that forcing something wasn't going to work out and that you weren't much worthy of any of my energy wasted.

I guess not everything revolves around you, and it shouldn't have to either.
Your existence though, a beautiful something so similar to how the trees look against the sky and how the roots of the tree in my yard have grown.
How most of you is broken.

How I'm o.k.a.y

You were a part of me.

I let you go.

*And I'm still alive and breathing.