when we kissed i couldnt help but thinking
how we would lay in eachothers arms till we would be asleep and i imagined me, telling everything about my past exposing myself
and i didn't realize that you too, as being a human being,
had the ability to leave
and you did
just like my best friends did after i ran away from home
it was painful and i couldn't comprehend why
had i done something wrong?
i was certainly not enough, for otherways you'd have stayed
my best friends didn't stay and you followed their lead
now, months later i still dream about you
i obligate myself to distract my mind so that it will not wander to you but,
to be honest every night you enter my mind and it feels like i'm cheating
but it feels as such a relieve to think of you that once i start i cannot stop and than all of a sudden- it is two am and i become ******* sad because you don't even bother to say hi to me when you see mee
how the **** is it possible to love someone even after they said to you: i don't like you? what's wrong with me?