i’m realizing freedom is in reach and it always has been. i don’t have to change the things around me or inside me. nurturing gratefulness and peace and love has never been easier or more rewarding. i'm remembering the reasons i gave myself away in the first place and they seem silly now. the loneliness i associated with myself was always a lie—my independence and strength lack nothing but the things i never needed in the first place.

My mind is a blockage,
Whose hands are firmly placed on my eyes,
Blinding me to the only things I need to see.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose voice screams,
Telling me I will not succeed.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose eyes stare into me,
With more judgment than I have ever received.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose measuring tape
Is too small to even wrap around my body.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose lips tense
When I make any decision that impacts lives.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose teeth grind
When I try to save my own life.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose arms cross
When I think I’m doing what’s right.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose tongue
Rolls off lies like it will save it’s life.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose foot
Stomps me down when I feel alive.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose shattered trust
Makes me feel unsafe when I am alright.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose tears
Make me feel ashamed of my life.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose shakiness
Makes me question my reckless flights.
My mind is a blockage,
Whose rashness
Tells me to jump in and risk my life.
My mind is a blockage,
And I’m tired
Of that being my life.

You are my King,
You are my everything.
You don't know,
But I will never choose to go.
And I don't know if you ever will,
If one day you will get your fill,
But I hope not.
I love you a lot.
I want to wake up to your smile,
And look into your eyes for a while.
I want you to be my life,
Through good times and through strife.
You fill me up,
You make things less rough.
I want to stay by your side,
I love that you're mine.
You have made me love my life,
You have made me fight for my life.
Things are flowing,
And I don't mind not knowing,
Where we are headed.
I don't mind it,
I love your surprises.
You have made me feel the highest,
Filled me with the brightest.
I have connected,
My heart is reflected.
You feel this,
And I feel this.
You have been forgiving,
And that has my heart brimming.
I fear confrontation,
But with you there are no limitations.
I do not have to fear you,
And there are very few
Of people like that,
Few people who have my back.
But I trust you,
And that's something new.
I want to do everything I can,
To show that I love having you as my man.
I want to do what you want,
And I want to be your confidant.
You can trust me,
Trust me.
I do not want just you to carry
What is hard for me.
I want to hold you up,
When **** is rough.
I want to hold your hand
When you feel as if you cannot stand.
I want to have your back,
When they lack.
You don't know,
But I will never choose to go.
You are my King,
You are my everything.

He left me.
He hurt me.
He lied to me.
He made it hard for me to trust.
But,
I trust you.
I trust that
You won't leave me,
You will be kind to me,
You will be honest,
You are the best thing for me.

Just in case you didn't know,
Right now,
I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
Not because you are going to succeed.
Not because you dream of money.
Not because you give me things.
Because you love me.
Because you are perfect.
Because I love you.

I cannot get enough of you,
And I can't tell if that is good or bad,
Truly.
I am in love with you,
And I can't tell if that is good or bad,
Truly.
You make me enjoy life,
And I can't tell if that is good or bad,
Truly.
I would spend my life with you,
And I can't tell if that is good or bad,
Truly.
But truly,
I don't give a ****.
I love you,
And I am abandoning all fear.
I am trusting you,
Wholeheartedly.
And truly,
All I ask,
Is that you love me back.

I never thought I would
Ever
Be this in love again.
But I am.
I miss you when you aren't around,
I adore everything about you.
Your smile makes me happy.
Your cheeks make me happy.
Your eyelashes make me happy.
Your lips make me happy.
Your eyes make me happy.
Every individual hair on your face makes me happy.
Your hair makes me happy.
Your ears make me happy.
Your neck makes me happy.
Your tongue makes me happy.
Your shoulders make me happy.
Your chest makes me happy.
Your stomach makes me happy.
Your back makes me happy.
Your arms make me happy.
Your hands make me happy.
Your fingers make me happy.
Your legs make me happy.
Your *** makes me happy.
Your feet make me happy.
Your chin makes me happy.
How you stand makes me happy.
How you look at me makes me happy.
The way you rap makes me happy.
How much you love music makes me happy.
The way you kiss me makes me happy.
The way you touch me makes me happy.
The way you taste makes me happy.
The way you shake makes me happy.
The control you exert makes me happy.
Your dominance makes me happy.
How chill you are makes me happy.
How much you loves me makes me happy.
The way you own me makes me happy.
The way you set rules for me makes me happy.
When you tell me what to do it makes me happy.
Being able to serve you makes me happy.
Being able to be controlled by you makes me happy.
How you expose me to new things makes me happy.
How you teach me makes me happy.
How you praise me makes me happy.
Every single thing about you makes me happy,
And that's hard for me to handle.
I have never loved anyone this absolutely.
But I love you.
Right now,
I want to forever be with you.
And that may not be what fate has in store for us,
But by the gods,
I hope it is.
Because I would love to spend my entire life with you.