we are an ignorant generation, loosely saying words when we don't know what they mean. So we speak, while stuck in between truths and lies. And we will continue to sleep beneath polluted skies.

aching, tired, weary.

Pain?

Me?

Why ever me? My pain shrinks.

Never, oh never would that happen.

At least that's what everyone else thinks.

I cover my feelings with a mask of happiness.

Trying to hide,

Trying to shield myself from deadliness

Of my heart.

I sit here thinking, wondering, I feel,

I feel dumbstruck.

Like Alice, curious, wondering,

Wondering what's going on in this wonderland of emotions.

I feel stuck.

I don't even know who I am,

Myself!

But apparently everyone else does.

At least that's what everyone else thinks.

Me.

Me.

Me, myself, and I.

Am I the one or am I three?

No one will ever know.

Well, maybe,

Just maybe,

Everyone else will.

Remember I'm happy!

Happy.

Happy?

Am I really?

At least that's what everyone else thinks.

Am I the only one that has their demons feasting upon their souls?
They say it is easy to tie a noose around your mind,
To overcome the urges and temptations of ending your life with a suicide
They don't know the true pain and torment that is going on in my head
An epic battle that leaves me with restless nights in bed
"End your life already" they say, as they prey on me during my weakest hours
Sometimes I give into the voices, carrying the sharp blade to my wrist
Crying as I struggle to mutter three powerful words that keeps me going
Choking on my sobs, my lungs deflate with a desire to say that God loves me
I try to convince myself that God is trying to test my faith
And to just wait, wait and wait
Then my Demons will eventually go AWAY.....



~Imperfect Desire **