Woke up at 4pm today
and remembered I have no dreams
that have flown beyond the cage,
and past the cage there's still
a burning coal mine.
Ten foot sunflower standing out back
trying to be a beacon in the night,
like a blind leader for the dead;
sending them down that river,
paper boats across a sea of lies,
and there is no right direction.
Once you set foot here you are
lost permanently.
No one knows if it even
had a beginning,
or if it'll ever have an end.
Woke up late with  a ten-foot sunflower
at the foot of my bed, harvesting canaries.

today lead me to music
to beauty
to love
i'm usually the ***** poet
the drinker and smoker
the under achiever
but tonight
I feel capable of
inhaling the benevolent energy
of 100 suns
of swallowing whole
a whole a spoonful of love
I love talking in cliches
because **** being real
i wear headphones
so I can ignore the world
swipe right on tinder
Let me be your latest fix
I'm the smiling faced jester
looking to win the ****** race
but you make me happy
happier than minimal clouds
the sun is shining
I am red
but I feel as if
I bathed in orange and deep yellows
**** my poetry
this is a status check
I hope you all are fine
the people with whom I connect

tomorrow morning,
i will brew up some coffee,
drink it black,
and lay in my bed with
waltz #2 on repeat
and i wont i won't
i won't
think
about it.

i've burned bigger bridges than you.

If you don't want me to go,
don't push me away.
If you don't want me to stay,
don't pull me closer.
If you don't want to remember,
don't ask me to explain.
Tell me to leave
only after you've held me close.
Tell me you hate me
only after you've stolen a kiss.
Tell me you're sorry
only after you've left bruises.

Tell me you love me
and I'll stay.

i remember
one of the times
i got scared and
called it off,
you found someone else.
when you told me
you still loved me
at 3 in the morning,
i asked you, in a
desperate attempt
for you to hurt me
more than i had
hurt myself,
"did you sleep with her?"
your answer still
to this day
leaves me wondering
if i want to break
her hands
or my own.