i scroll through names to count numbers


*AND THEN I REALIZE THAT I'VE FORGOTTEN YOU EXIST
but then you're there again
here again

May it always feel like this
May it be electricity that streams
through everything with
blood-rocking sweetness
May it never stop filling me
with what I cannot for the life of me
put into words…
that clear and soft thing,
that gasping blooming thing,
that glow in the deep deep core of me,
where you live

Alright now, right brain,
you're being insane.
                                                                  No, left brain! I'm just being alive.
                                                               You should try it---you might like it.

I worked hard to give him everything he cared about.
You were worried about the things that he was scared about.
I'm calm and collected when you act wild.
I am the adult, you are the child.

                                                     You think you're the right one every time!
                 You think you know everything, but you don't know anything
                                                                                                                     at all.
                                               Half of his problems were s'posed to be mine!
                                                                              But you wanted everything.
                                            I hope that you're happy--- 'cause he's sure not.

Like ribbons of smoke dancing in the air
You were beautiful
You were the Northern lights
Important enough to be watched in the freezing cold
You were fleeting and sweet
Cream swirling in coffee
Ripples in a pond
I loved you
But like all ephemeral things
Eventually you left too.

Striked kite
-lightning bolt-
key: string
rod electricity