Colors are all I see.
I think of him and cannot close my eyes
without seeing his outstanding smile.
I hear his infectious laugh in the wind.
The jokes he made were always so funny...
I see his brightness in the Sun out my window.
The moon reminds me of him as well.
All of the colors in the world just
remind me of him and his beauty.
His life brought joy to those around him.
I miss him already.
I miss his laid back attitude.
I miss his goofy smile.
I miss his kind eyes.
I really miss his sarcasm.
Even though I did not know his favorite color,
I know that I see him in ALL of the colors
that exist in this world.

Even the ones I cannot see.
I miss you Juan, rest in peace.

"Why do you look at me so much?"
maybe because I think God wove his best when He made your story
maybe because I think He struck gold when he built your heart
maybe because I think there's nothing more beautiful than your mind
maybe because I'd like to look through the world with your eyes
maybe because God made your hair to perfectly flow past my fingers
maybe because I'm in love with you
maybe because I have been in love with you
maybe because I was in love with you

silence.

..."What do you mean? No, I don't."

i regret not
telling you

(how i felt)

because in
all   of  my
daydreams
you     said
everything
i wanted to
          hear.

she is something more than necessary
a limb? a lung? an extra ounce of blood
pumping through every part of me
aching and wanting more and more
of something that i ever so need.
her touch is enough to ignite a flame
and her kiss is enough to make what
was little left of me bloom.
she lifts up my spirit and
makes me fly higher than anything
in the known universe.
everything about her is beautiful
her fingertips and the way she walks
and her delicacy and the way she
wants me as well.

she is beauty and even
her touch is enough
to ignite my soul
again.

it's just a touch.
her hand on mine,
her lips on mine.
just a touch
to spin the world
the other direction.
a simple momentary
exchange between two
bodies in silence,
in laughter, in tears.
just a touch.
her touch is enough
for a lifetime.

a while ago, you told me
mr. huck told you that
"men have *** for power" and
"women have *** for love"
and you'd thought to yourself, wait,
I'd do it for power.
I can't help but wonder-
if I had told you that you could've had me
on my knees begging for mercy,
twice,
would things have been different?

Late at night is when I think
And try to I clear my head
I often stay awake all night
Just laying in my bed

As soon as I get comfy
Thoughts start racing in
I start to question everything
and regret my every sin

At first the thoughts are gentle
Like what will I do tomorrow
But as time crawls by; they escalate
Till I'm drowning in my sorrow

I think of all my failures
Every detail of what I did wrong
After hours of reliving pain
I convince myself I don't belong

I suddenly feel isolated
and like the silence will never end
I feel like I will never escape
There's too much I just can't mend

I feel overpowered and worthless
Like I'll never do anything right
I hide till the world fades away
And I'm awoken by the light

I realize a new day has come
It's time to put on a brave face
I put those negative thoughts away
Until I return to this place

on the way home
i listened to music
that made me think of you
blessing each note
with my mind, saying
"thank you for understanding
every single time"
and i say this to the music
because i cannot say it to your face
and yes, i just compared you
to the corner of my life
where everything is sound and i feel safe
and yes, it is
a compliment

she whispers like the stars
saying an infinite truth
and she kisses like the sun
and endlessly loves
like the moon.

Her insane beauty makes all of life worth living again.

I wanted so badly to uncover a bright clean heart in you
I kept on digging like a mad dog in the dirt

I know it's gotta be here somewhere.
See this is urgent
All I wish for now is to find a glimmer of hope in the dirt
And climb on up to the surface with that treasure in the palm of my hand.

"See! Proof that you want to live to see tomorrow"