My thoughts begin to wander,
I begin to shake uncontrollably,
I'm terrified of my thoughts,
The images that I think about,
The music,
I turn it off,
It's stopped working,
The relief isn't there anymore,
Fear begins to set in,
As I grasp onto to the last hold of control,
I become the enemy as my body just wants to let go,
To float in a world of carelessness,
I sit down and just let my thoughts consume me,
My body shakes and I let it,
Μy mind shows the facts of death,
My death,
I'll think of the places where the blood will drip out if I were to hang upside down,
I'll imagine someone would see the pool of blood on the floor and I would be forgiven,
I'll imagine that I'm watching a baby no more then a few weeks old,
Being murdered in the hands of the doctor and priest baptizing the drowned child,
And I'll laugh in a courtroom,
As the jury and judge stare in disbelief and horror as the conviction is read in their eyes,
The judgement is of all society,
My mind begins to collapse under the stares and verdict,
Guilty,
I'll think about how they'll condemn me to death,
Will it be swift,
Or will I suffer to be forgiven,
I have gone to deep,
I've become interested and I begin to want to go farther in my thoughts,
As I fall through the trapdoor of thought ,
I attempt to to grab onto anything,
But the walls I fall with are bare,
This hole is endless,
But I've reached the end early.
It's a poem