My life is one born of instinct;
I act, I do not think.
Your accusations are indistinct,
but rational.
How could I possibly argue your truth?
Still, I feel my heart sink.
Perhaps I'm too lost in my youth.
My intrinsic patterns proved fatal.

Calling me a prepubescent child felt unneeded though.

It is maddening
To see you suffer so much
Your fields dry, barren.

I wish I could help
But my desert is arid
I've no rains to share

Instead I must watch
See as your life empties out
History repeats

A moment more akin to eternity,
Yet an option otherwise is something to fear.
I have days when I want her,
Yet more days when I don't.
I must live without the clarity
Of what I really want so dear;
Maybe it's simpler to just endure,
Even if I know I won't.

The loneliness hurts,
But it's all I know.

Does it bring you sick joy?
Or do you even notice what you do?
You broke me like some toy,
And still my only purpose is to annoy...
Don't you get that?

I'm afraid of you.

See me cower away into the background
Any time you look my way;
I try to spread your words around,
But your presence clammed up what I needed to say.
But you like that.

You love to be feared.

The rain soaks through my skin to bone,
Holding me here as I push forth alone;
To forgive of sins I've refused to atone.
But as my feet bare cold against hardened stone
The voices return to me, a ceaseless drone
Of hatred and misgivings too oft overblown,
And I lose myself again, refusing to condone
Every action I've taken, creating a throne

Of self-important misery.

But then I see your eyes afore me,
And I find my place again.

A month has gone by
My skies sparkle afore me
Opportunity

Fog rolls thick through pervading waves,
Obscuring the stars the heart of man craves,
My ship, lost in mist, must fade away,
Never again to see a new way
To escape from the sadness we all feel deep,
And to lose ourselves in the beauty of sleep,
But maybe that's not so bad.

We write our best art when we're sad.

Again you offer
To bring me into your world
I deserve it not

Her eyes are so pretty
Her fur is so fluffy
I tried to be witty
With a name so strange

Yet now I see her
A kitty like this
A name like that
Listening to her purr
Listening to her hiss
Perfect for a cat-pat

How did this happen

Hope for purest white
Deep crimson scattered atop
Life within the snow

Dark, yet comforting clouds set in above me,
Masking my vision from all that I fear.
My art flows from me, unrestricted and free
From the doubts and misgivings ever filling my ear.

There's a place here, somewhere forgotten,
Lying isolated betwixt awareness and sleep,
A place where I'm free from all my misbegotten
Deeds and mistakes, things that make me feel cheap.

To find myself in my mind's twilight,
It truly is the inarguable highlight,
Of a life befitting a parasite,
Dragging down ev'ryone in the fight,
Who all just want to see that light
That lies in my mind as I drift into night.

How cruel fate must be,
To turn me against my kin.
My desperation is becoming too thick to see
Any kind of retribution from this sin;
This sin of the face I wear, this prison of a body,
I hate them for being closer to freedom.
This furious envy I have come to embody
Suffocates me as the sinners of *****.
I'm losing myself to the darkest pits
Of my hideous mind, gnarled and rotten,
And that stink of selfishness now befits
This monster who has all but forgotten
What it was ever like to live free;
The gods themselves will not forfend
This state of being I deserve to be.
This nightmare will not end.