Sara Leal

Sara Leal Sep 2015

3 a.m,
It's the hour when I usually get out of my bed,
And go smoke one more outside,
Two more,
Three more,
Basically until my need it's satisfied.
What it's never.

English version

Sara Leal Sep 2015

My poisonous oxygen// (2)

1,
2,
3,
10,
16,
Today I smoked 16 cigarettes*.
Hmmm tomorrow I need to smoke more.

English version

Sara Leal Sep 2015

My poisonous oxygen// (1)

I don't breath air.
And if I do,
My air it's a mortal one.

English version

Sara Leal Sep 2015

Untitled

I'm a difficult person,
I admit it.
Sometimes I don't take the words of other people just because of little things about them.
But that's how I'm.
And when a rebellion of voices is in my head,
I start panicking,
I start searching for help.
Some people keep talking with me until I'm calm,
They try to understand me,
Even when I don't understand myself.
And other people just go away,
Stop talking with me,
And call me crazy and stupid,
They give up on me.
I understand them,
If I could I would give up on me too.
But I can't,
And there are people who don't want to give up on me,
They make me see I have some value left,
That's not bad being sad,
Or making mistakes.
We are human beings that's how we are.
So stop expecting me to be perfect,
Stop saying I'm not worth of it,
Because I am.
I have people to prove it.
And if you don't want to stay in my life because of one bad moment of mine,
Then that's your problem,
Not mine.

English version

#mistakes #human #me #you

Sara Leal Sep 2015

Why it's so hard?

I don't miss you.

I don't want to see you ever again.

I don't want anything of you in my life.

I forgot your name.

But I still love you and have memories of you in my mind.

Why?

Why* is it so hard to delete everything?

Why?

Because it happened and it's there,

And there's nothing I can do to delete it.

And the fact that I know it makes me frustrated,

I feel like crying.

Because I don't know what went wrong,

I don't know why, the simple why I still love you.

But not how I did before,

Because now it seems that it grows everyday.

And I would like to know,

Know why.

But I already know that this is one of those questions that don't have an answer,

Neither for me, or for him.

English version

#questions #answers #me #you

Sara Leal Sep 2015

"*******"

Sometimes when you come to me crying and saying that you did it again,
I just want to say "*******".
Because nobody really deserves to be with you.
"*******", because I don't want to hear your excuses again.
"*******", because you think you're better than me.
"*******", because you really deserve to be ****** up by yourself.
"*******", for all the times you ****** me and I didn't enjoy it.
"*******", for not loving me.
"*******", for staying with me without reasons.
"*******", for knowing me.
But most important of all,"*******" because I don't say any of these words.

English version

Sara Leal Sep 2015

That *****

Do you know what to do when you're sad?
When you're mad?
I don't.
Everything I do when I'm sad or mad it's a ******* impulse.
A ******* impulse.
I would like to control it but sometimes I can't.
I can't!
It's like it's not even me that thinks in that moment,
Or maybe it's the me that thinks too much.
I don't even know.
Have you ever done something and then regretted it?
I did.
That *****.
I don't like to feel that way.
It's like you thought that you knew everything,
That you knew yourself.
But the reality it's that you don't.
I don't.
Not even someone who isn't born yet knows!
We don't know anything.
I don't know anything.
And then we just keep doing the same and the same mistakes,
And that makes me sick,
Sick of life.
Because I do that ******* same mistakes too.
Don't we know that that it's a ******* mistake?
Don't we know that's bad?
Don't I know it?
Yes, we do.
Yes, I do.
We still do it anyway.
I still do it anyway.
We are really selfish beings,
We all are.
I'm.
**And that ******* *****.

English version

#sad #wrong #you #me #selfish #mad #mistakes