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4.7k · Dec 2014
Reassuring Happiness
Chrissy Dec 2014
Living in a world where
reassurance of worth,
is solely found in thoughts
and hearts,
of another on earth.

Reassurance exists.
Everywhere.

In;
rain that falls,
moonlight that stalls.
Love when shared,
animals when scared.
Sun that shines,
the ocean's tide.

Cease,

putting precious worth
in the hands of another,
whose capability of
concealing the radiant
and destroying the fragile,
are second in nature.
One who is ignorant
of true worth,
and happiness.

Everywhere.
2.5k · Nov 2017
Scent
Chrissy Nov 2017
Your clothes,
my back.
Your scent
entangled in every inch
of the fabic.
It was my favorite part
of being drowned
in your clothing.
Your scent.
Your safe presence.
No longer.
On the ground, drowning in your clothes
after you promised
it’d never happen again.
Round number 8 now.
Tears seamlessly running
down my face. Drowning.
Your scent, a reminder of each broken promise.
A prisoner of your love.
Chained by your clothing.
Drowning.
Held captive by your scent.
1.3k · Sep 2014
Games
Chrissy Sep 2014
Life is but a game,
And we are the pieces.
We're put here for entertainment,
But we leave here defeated.

No one is a victor in this game,
As much as one would disagree.
We're all captives together,
Never to be set free.

But in this game,
We do have a quest.
To find another like ourselves,
And give them our very best.

You're my solution to this quest,
The one I've been put here to find.
The one I need to get through this game,
The one I could never leave behind.

You make me feel whole inside.
You make me feel complete.
When I'm with you in this game,
we successfully compete.

I need my partner,
My best friend by my side.
As we endure this fight together,
Your survival occupies my mind.

To see your dazzling smile,
Is the fuel I need to survive.
This game is wretched,
But together we thrive.

It's taken me a while,
To find you in this game.
But now that I have found you,
In my heart you'll forever remain.
1.2k · Sep 2014
Life vs. Death
Chrissy Sep 2014
There is a funny way life drives you through.
It is difficult, it is painful and without a clue.
There are many paths you can take,
But you can only walk through one at a time.
And if you choose the wrong one,
Life beats you, but still expects you to go on.
Life brings joy and happiness as well,
Don't think only "horror" in life dwells.
It gives you others to lead you through.
It shows you who is there no matter what you do.
Life always tends to fight with death,
And sometimes death is the champion.
For it takes innocent loved ones or any who dwell in life,
And blames it on life alone, so we reproach it for death lies.
Death laughs in our face, over and over and over again.
It calls us a "naïve creation" for being so blind,
We **** our own everyday, just like we **** our minds.
We think with abortion there is something we will gain.
Life is upset because each day we care less.
It fights for us to take the right path but we go our own way.
Life wakes us up from unconsciousness and helps us not to astray,
But we reject and blame life for our own mistakes.
Life doesn't leave us, for we know not what we play.
1.1k · Jan 2015
Blood
Chrissy Jan 2015
All of mankind settles for the simplest pleasures. The limitations were placed intently upon the mind as a barbed wire fence. Being confined to comfort zones is what is expected from the average to prevent blood. Hurt. Regret. Scars. Yet, everything worth anything in life is achieved outside the norm, embraced with an open mind and awareness; a risk of shedding blood. Blood that would later be used as the ink to spell out memories. Experiences. Impulses are so important. The honest words from the heart are exposed before the mind has a chance to intervene. It was written for mankind to grow. Do not ignore what lies dormant in the depths of human blood and prophecy, urging to be awoken. Seize the day. Act on impulse. Bleed. Heal. Grow. It's your turn.
1.1k · Jan 2015
Fate
Chrissy Jan 2015
"What could've beens" haunt my mind along with the scent of your t-shirt in the loneliest hour of the inky black night. Stars are so beautiful, so far away from each other yet so beautiful. That is what we are. Beautiful apart. And just as the Stars have accepted they will never burn infinitely together, I have learned to accept our fate. Memories flicker across my mind and I remember the way you said "You're beautiful," with your fingers interlocking with mine creating something that could never be broken. Except by her. She held the key and all I could do was desperately hold on like a stubborn dog who wants nothing more than to feel affection from his owner. As the owner slams the door, the dog realizes that the owner doesn't want him, as I have learned to accept our fate. You never wanted anything more than to steal a kiss from my naked lips, craving more of my affection and care to keep you going every time you landed your poaching eyes upon me. Like a leach ******* the life from me, I have learned to accept our fate. It's 3am and I have often thought of what you're dreaming, but a twisted mind can only be deciphered by another like it and I'm so sorry I was never like you. Opposites attract they say, but I repel you. Similar to the like-poles of a magnet, never designed to meet, I have learned to accept our fate. When you chose her, I lost myself. Now, I am journeying to find the light once again, like a girl who fell hopelessly, one sidedly, in love, and realized the harsh truth that it can never be, I yearn to change my fate.
927 · Jan 2015
History
Chrissy Jan 2015
History is achieved
through the people
who are fearless 
of experience.

The stars; did you really seen them? 
Haiti; have you ever been?
The sea; did you carefully navigate?
Hell; have you ever sinned? 

Make your own story.
Contribute a verse,
to the composition
of our Earth.
920 · Dec 2014
What If
Chrissy Dec 2014
What if we weren't a people who admired external appearances?

What if instead of:
Our eyes, existed our favorite color;
Our hair, existed our favorite food;
Our bones, existed our life stories;
Our heads, existed our knowledge;
Our ears, existed our favorite music;
Our smile, existed our favorite joke;
Our hearts, existed our capacity to love.

Would you still find someone beautiful?
910 · Nov 2014
Piece of Paper
Chrissy Nov 2014
That piece of paper
Runs your life.
It causes you fear
And desperate strife.

The government takes
And leaves you empty
For that piece of paper
Is a lifeline of plenty

We print the paper
Distribute it to all
pay for meaningless things
And suddenly we fall

This piece of paper
Ruins our lives
Leaves us broken
Fearful through the night

For we need this paper
To succeed in our society
To be viewed as "priveledged"
As everyone wants to be

When is this paper
Going to cease
Running our lives
And causing defeat

I want to burn this paper
It doesn't define who we are
Our importance is known by God
And we are as magnificent as His stars

We were created by
The most majestic being
The one whom we believe in
The one we love without seeing

This paper breaks our connection
With the one and only bond
We have with each other, ourselves
And our one and only God.
867 · Sep 2015
You'll Live Forever
Chrissy Sep 2015
You'll life forever, right?

You have your head wrapped intently around your phone. Your individual problems consuming your mind. You keep your head down when people walk by so they don't decipher the two blemishes that made a home adjacent to your nose. You cry over the person who took your heart, ruthlessly crushed it then gave it back more damaged than before. You stress about college, the job you will have along with the salary you will acquire. You worry about the children you will birth and the location of your next move.

While doing these things..

You missed the warm sunshine beating on the windowsill of a bedroom filled with darkness, while you were looking at your phone screen. You missed the solving of the world's problems, while you were too busy worrying over your own. You kept your head down to hide your blemishes, when your smile could have saved someone's life. You cried over a person who hurt you, and you avoided your next opportunity to fall in love. You stressed about the future like it was promised, when your time on earth was escaping you with each passing second.

But you lived forever, right?
866 · Feb 2017
Emotionless
Chrissy Feb 2017
They ask why my eyes
stare blankly into space,
and why no emotions
blanket my face.

My walls reach higher,
my skin grows rough,
my smile turns dull.
My heart has had enough.

Silence fills conversations,
sadness glazes stares.
Fear fiercely pushes away
any person who cares.

I don't understand
why I feel this way.
For I tell them to leave,
yet I long that they stay.
804 · Aug 2014
Stranger
Chrissy Aug 2014
I've come to feel that
in fact,
it's just rude for someone to show up at the door
unannounced
expect me to drop whatever I'm doing and answer it
when it happens to be convenient for them.
If you're regularly bothered
by unannounced callers at your front door,
learn to just let it ring
It'll make your life
a lot easier.
770 · Jun 2015
The Past
Chrissy Jun 2015
The past is beautiful. It provides us life lessons from which we can learn and grow based on prior experiences. Our memory will always recall the past, each and every day of our lives. Present experiences will evoke memories of the past, good or bad. In the end, the only evidence we have of the past is within the confines of our own mind. Why? Because the 'past' does not exist. Existence is defined as the state of living, and the past has not, nor has it ever been, given life. The intangibility of this phenomenon also contributes to its absence of existence. Once the present moment is grasped and taken ahold of, it is then disposed of into a man-made idea of 'time'. Our lives are constructed around a ticking circle with numbers written on the outside. Once a moment passes, it simply can no longer be reached. If in our lives, we consider the past as a dangerous place due to the mistakes we once performed, we must remind ourselves; the past does not exist. The 'time' it will take us to heal from detrimental experiences does not exist either. Time isn't 'medicine'. Hell, time is not REAL. What is real is right here, right now. Do not dwell on life in the past, because you'll be spending the duration of your life getting lost in a world of regret. Learn each day, live each experience, and love as hard as you can. Mistakes are the greatest tools to living a successful life once learned from them, so don't allow anyone to judge you based off them. When other people begin to ridicule you concerning your past, it is simply because their sins are different from yours. We all live and learn in a variety of ways, and we should never judge someone based on a facet of their life in which no longer defines who they are; for the past does not exist. The past is a lie.
767 · Oct 2014
Home
Chrissy Oct 2014
Everyday
I live
With this feeling.
A feeling of pure
Regret.
Nothing more,
Nothing less.
Why
Did I hurt
The one person
Who would
Never
Dare to hurt
me?
A shout
Into the
Void
Is my desperation
For your voice.
And bucket list ideas
Accumulate in mind
To share them with you
As I look
Out the window.
Longing for your
Touch at 12:05am
After we agreed we'd
Be sleeping by midnight.
And still I dreamt of you
Every night
Of happiness
Our sunsets
Our laughter and bananas.
The times when I sang
When you played
Countless songs with pure
Greatness.
You were light to darkness
I wish you could fill
Again
With the lantern
That was once
Your smile
That I'd kiss every day,
every night in my dreams.
Wrapped in your embrace
I felt home.
I want to be home.
Please,
Call me home.
763 · Oct 2014
The Rain
Chrissy Oct 2014
It begins;
lightly.
As if someone
were gently
tapping
upon your skin
with eyelids
closed,
imagining a world
that could've been.
It begins to fall
harder now,
as guilt and doubt.
Slowly soaking
in regret.
Harder now,
it falls.
Flooding.
Masking memories.
Feelings of happiness
excitement, eagerness,
love.
Gone.
The soul craves
salvation
from thoughts.
Though God
answers this plea;
the past still remains,
but the tears
stop falling
as if
they were rain.
712 · Aug 2014
Denial
Chrissy Aug 2014
I love you.
I'm going to keep saying it.
No matter
how much you deny.

Why waste a minute
without telling you?
It's life;
temporary,
just like all things.
Over soon,
but
I love you.

Why not embrace it
for all it's worth?
Especially with you.
The meaning
is forever,
happiness is true,
and
I love you.

Why deny myself
the greatest
pleasure I've ever known?
You.
I love you.

All parts of me,
you eagerly discover.
Always wondering,
what I'll do.
And I love you.

I'm better next to you.
When we're apart,
I'm lost.
I long to be found
by you.
And I love you.

The way your fingers
swiftly play the notes
of the guitar,
reveal the passion
you hide so deeply
behind a smile
that can only be
deciphered by a few.
And I love you.

How genuine you are
with a soft curve
in your delicate smile
that I strive to keep
on that handsome
face.
Although I'm not
able to see it often,
with the short time I have,
I make do.
And,
I love you.

Every story that lies
behind your beautiful
hazel eyes,
requires time to be revealed.
But I patiently await
when I can be the one
to whom you turn to,
And I love you.

Music to my ears
is your laughter
when caused by
the little things.
And I don't understand
why
you find the beauty
in every situation
with your optimistic
world view.
And I love you.

We've endured everything.
Not one minute
easier than the next.
Yet the love we share
had bounded us to being
great friends,
amazing lovers,
and we still push through.
I love you.

Every night is
more easily slept.
Every morning is
more easily awakened.
Because of your presence
in my life,
my heart,
you have renewed.
And I love you.

I love you.
I'm going to keep saying it.
No matter
how much you deny.
708 · Sep 2015
Born to Die
Chrissy Sep 2015
Have you ever realized, we are born to die?

I hope you do not let that simple comment that is perceived as 'negative' dissuade you from finding a purpose to this wonderful life. There is a certain beauty in dying. We leave a legacy of happiness, love, hope and passion to fertilize generations to come. How beautiful is the concept of life? To put the world and all it's glory above our own personal desires?
615 · Dec 2016
Emptiness
Chrissy Dec 2016
Weights.
One thousand weights
resting on the heart,
until it breaks.

So heavy,
yet so hallow.
Tears yearn to emerge,
but they're swallowed.

Happiness, peace, effort,
exerted into the world.
Nothing left
for the girl.
Chrissy Dec 2016
I know a girl. I see her walking down a busy street. Her eyes are glossy with tears that are assembling rapidly, shielding her vision. She walks with her head down, examining the ground below her, desperately trying to disappear into the background of the chaotic world. She is so beautiful; or at least, that is what they tell her. She looks in the mirror, searching for every flaw that she is able to find, becoming increasingly dissatisfied. She turns sideways, lifting up her shirt to expose her stomach. Imperfection upon imperfection. She meets a boy. He is everything she needs. He tells her she is beautiful. Therefore, it must be true.

She finds solace through the drugs and alcohol that distort her brain. She wants to forget what she looks like. She longs to dismiss her past. At the conclusion of the evening, she stumbles her way into his arms. She cannot take care of herself. She needs him; or at least she tells herself she does. She cannot stand alone.
510 · Jul 2017
Fireworks
Chrissy Jul 2017
The colors illuminated the sky,
the noises flooded her ears,
but the only thing she felt
in her eyes were tears.

Harsh words ringing louder
than the bombs bursting in air.
The chaos escalating the fight
that simply one kiss could repair.

He had had enough,
leaving her naked in hand.
As she stared into the sky,
unable to stand.

The stream of water on her cheeks became visible
as sparks of light blanketed the sky.
And suddenly she had forgotten
why she began to cry.
502 · Dec 2016
When I Was Six-and-Ten
Chrissy Dec 2016
When I was six-and-ten,
I heard a wise man warn,
“Follow your heart, not your head,
and true love will be born.
Once you find love,
Do not set it free.”
But I was six-and-ten,
Naïve of what was to be.

When I was six-and-ten,
I heard him warn once more,
“Do not dissuade your heart’s desire,
to please those who deplore.”
For love is unique,
it can never truly be defined.”
Now I am eight-and-ten,
still lamenting the victory of my mind.
480 · Jan 2017
The Fight
Chrissy Jan 2017
‪He once said he valued our love
too much to fight‬.
‪So he'd swallow his pride, ‬
‪and tell me I was right‬.

He now screams‬ violently
‪until his voice becomes sore.
And I tell him he's right,
because I love him more.

395 · Dec 2016
The Writer
Chrissy Dec 2016
The writer traveled along as well.
He always had a story to tell
of perceptions he had carefully compiled.
With a journal in hand, often he smiled.

Composing notes and observing all.
Taking in scenery, watching leaves fall.
With a furrowed brow and squinted eyes,
constantly wondering, questioning, “why?”

Intuitive and brave, he painted
illustrations with words he created.
His appearance was pleasant,
one would feel graced by his presence.

Optimism was his pure demeanor,
not one other viewed the world clearer.
He cherished life and all that it entailed.
With golden hair, his skin was far from paled.

His closeness to the floor of the earth,
Made him understand the importance of its worth.
And so he writes of the world’s wonders,
he writes of each person’s blunders.
For the mysteries that lie within his soul,
are written on the pages he never told.
378 · May 2017
No Direction
Chrissy May 2017
Plans.
Out of my hands
for my own life,
causing strife.

Perfection.
19, still being shown direction
for my own life,
causing strife.

Unhappiness.
Utter distress
over my own life,
causing strife.

Control lacks.
Demanding it back,
for my own life,
No more strife.
367 · Dec 2016
A Prayer
Chrissy Dec 2016
Help suffering people to seek salvation,
for they are not greedy.
These people need your blessings,
They are very needy.

Look upon the faces
of all your suffering children.
Do you realize and see
what kind of world we live in?

Look into the souls
of all the poor and dying.  
Do you see them? Do you hear them?
They are screaming and crying.

Look into the hearts
of your Father’s deepest creation.
They are giving up, not persevering.
They need your motivation.

Come down to us,
and hear your people’s plea.
Grant them everlasting life.
Please, set them free.
319 · Jun 2017
Heartbreak
Chrissy Jun 2017
It's intoxicatingly exciting:
Heartbreak.
Breathing quickens.
Heart races.
Mind wanders.
Just to feel alive

The feeling that incarcerates your being
when all you can hear are footsteps fading into the night.
Helpless.
Adrenaline filled.
Two disturbing questions dominating your thoughts:
Will he come back?
Do I deserve this?
238 · Jun 2018
Changes
Chrissy Jun 2018
Woke up
happy.
My skin clearer,
my smile brighter,
my body stronger.
Realizing just how happy
I can be.
195 · Jul 2018
Prescription
Chrissy Jul 2018
Letting you go
was the
best
medicine
I’ve ever
prescribed
137 · Apr 2019
Wait
Chrissy Apr 2019
To the girl who is crying on the ground of her dorm room,
Over the boy who was incapable of seeing her worth,
Who took her heart and shattered it,
Leaving her in pain and undeniable agony,
This is for you.

I was there.

Two years later,
I’m in the arms of a man,
Who picked me up off the ground,
Wiped the hurting tears from my eyes,
Willingly fought every ghost of my past,
Paints the biggest smile on my face,
Takes care of my heart,
And shines the greatest ray of sunshine upon my life.

Your person is coming. Don’t give up.

— The End —