I dont need help.
Maybe I do.
Do I?
How the hell would you know..unless you are in my head fighting the demons off..but you know that you’d  NEVER **** them..right??
Im talking to myself.
Is that crazy?
Insane?
******?
Does everyone talk to themselves the way I do?
I need help!
I’ve asked but,I ran away.
From help...thats how insane I am…
help?
Is there such thing?
Maybe.
Maybe not.
Well maybe not for me.
Help is a definition of **** me slowly..
When you ask for help you get tortured,humiliated your demons in your head scream and laugh at how much of a ******* wimp you are for snitching on them!
You will never get help if you're  in my situation you’ll only suffer your heart will only keep breaking and your demons will grow bigger.

Can I die?
Well yeah you can they say.
But they don’t  know what I mean.
They don't know I mean **** myself
suffer
pain
die.
I'm asking them please.
They’re saying yes but they don't know what for.
I don't really matter.
can’t they see that I want to die
suffer painfully

Can I die?
Well yeah you can they say.
But they don’t  know what I mean.
They don't know I mean **** myself
suffer
pain
die.
I'm asking them please.
They’re saying yes but they don't know what for.
I don't really matter.
can’t they see that I want to die
suffer painfully

Can I die?
Well yeah you can they say.
But they don’t  know what I mean.
They don't know I mean **** myself
suffer
pain
die.
I'm asking them please.
They’re saying yes but they don't know what for.
I don't really matter.
can’t they see that I want to die
suffer painfully

Why the hell do I feel alone? can you answer my questions? Im drowning in a deep black hole,how the **** is that even possible?Well in my world it is possible,cause its happening to me!You understand? What about how every year I put death on my birthday wish list?
What about how I have the pain of dying on my bucket list,
or how Id love to just cut my hole body up until I have to cut over the other cuts?
Do you understand how I feel like i'm choosing this path for myself but in reality the path chose me I just was so young so I followed it?
Do you still understand?
you can help?
Me?
YOU?
Haven't I explained enough?
NO,you can't help me!
Its impossible,
Medication just makes me feel like ****,
talking to you makes me just wanna punch you in the ******* face until you just shut  the hell up,
Ive been to hospitals they just stalk me thats it.
do you really think that helps?
you cant help me?
you'll try but you’ll miserably fail?
The monster in me will destroy you if you try to help me!
it will not only make you suffer it will **** me.
You say you can help me but, there is no way that is possible.
I'm shattered glass on the pavement no longer able to be fixed
iIm broken never to be fixed

Is it okay?
That i'm different?
Is it okay?
That I wear black?
My cloths have rips in them?
How about how I wear dark make up?
Well I truly try to be good enough for you for everyone but, me.
Im sorry for being different.
Im sorry but i’ll never be good enough.
I never have been good enough for anyone especially myself.

he’s beautiful just sitting there waiting for the train to come by and hit him.Goodbye he’ll sing.
he’s beautiful even though he has a blade waiting for him underneath his mattress.
He’s beautiful even though he drowns his thoughts away with that little white and blue pill that just drags his rag doll body up into the white until he slowly painfully sinks back down again.

he’s beautiful even when he’s crying tears of blood!
I’ll always think he’s beautiful.
he’s perfect like a canvas of colors that fit perfectly together.
I love him
and always will
he’s the only one that I give a chance to throw my love away
he’s the only one that I trust enough to carry me away
He’s the only one that holds me in a daze
I love him
but,I can't have him
she has him
that lucky *** girl
but,she doesn't know how lucky she is
she cheats and then goes and tells him that she loves him and always will,
but in reality i'm the only one that means that
she is destroying my love
he’s going to die
I need to save him
but...I cant its impossible I can't fly high enough to reach him he’s in the white I'm not happy enough to do that for him,
I have to he’s my love
I can't just give up
he never did
I cant
I see that they’ve broke up
I saved him
but he doesn't love me anymore he’s after another girl.