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between the sweat
on the sick bed, i circle stray satellites
clustered on the ceiling. i let bliss speak

and leave me weak.

     my sun
slow licks my lips:
a fire spit. hot tongue. bony hipped.
i strum his back. his skin
and soul.

i reach fever pitch
     and burn up 'til i hit
the floor.
healing is hard
you clipped me on
those country roads;
you had me

in a spin.
slid like ice, broke like snow.
i loved you when you did that.

stepping graves, skipping time;
i love sitting in your sun and wine
though it never gets me drunk.
i'm too heated when i've sunk.

you flipped me on
my back. i liked that.
you had me

up in flames. you hit
and ran.
a floor wet, full
red. a bed freshly *******.
a body bare and sickle. she
is visible; a living thing to crawl inside.
that arrow in the sky
lands between my crystal eyes;
i’d been lying in your sheets, staring
at the blue above the ceiling.
my edges taut into a ball, blacking out
the small sun rolling on my neck.
every fibre is obliterated, i feel everything
and nothing. gone.

i absolve you.
i cannot break apart anymore.
i am guilt, you are guilt,
our joint guilt is dust to the light air.
i absolve
each tread; red-eyed, dissolving.
you are a tiny god
wrapped around the wounds.
am i strong? or stupid? or both?
you were my idol for so long. now i
worship me. i make the judgment and create
new things. i can be ready for love again.
forgiveness is hard.
how many limbs are left on us?
am i holding the bed, or holding the peace
for the eighteenth-hundred time?
we buryΒ  Β Β  down
and grow upΒ  Β Β  like a treeΒ  Β Β  **** the tree.
i seek out arches of disparity; burning a space
in which only we can breathe:
i latch to each sigh that escapes from you.

andΒ  Β Β  i swell upΒ  Β Β  at the thought
of losing you

Β  Β Β  all over again.

— The End —