Desperate to feel like you really don't care,
Needing to feel life that's really not there,
It scares you, and wears you, and you cannot bare,
Feeling your feelings when nobody cares.
You pick up the bottle, you pop down some pills,
Desperately trying to keep life at standstill.
You know that your life is starting to corrupt,
And sometimes you're hoping you'll never get up.
When sadness and madness swirl 'round in your mind,
you care less 'bout the mess that you left behind
Not trying to be careless, you're trying to be kind,
But there you are, helpless, you're that Frankenstein.
With blindness to kindness that you're trying to find,
your loved ones can't stay 'cause you show all the signs.
Signs of a kind of a reckless design,
And when you wake up, no one is left behind.
You're on your own, all alone, no one to blame,
Trying to own up to all of that shame.
You've got no one to go to who feels all your pain,
Cause everyone's done who still knows your **** name.
You try to find new people you can call friends,
But why do they fly away when you need them?
You cry and decide that this might be the end,
You lie and deny that it's not just pretend.
Cause if you don't die and you keep trying to mend,
then maybe for yourself you won't have to fend,
Maybe there's someone that can comprehend,
someone out there with a hand they can lend.
Then one day a kind soul appears from the dusk,
You want to be mindful and give them your trust.
But all of the times that you've tried to adjust
your mindset, you find that you're 'lone in the dust.
You tell yourself well this is hell I disgust,
But then you just yell and repel 'cause you must.
They might actually light up your darkest of nights,
They might be the brightness to make you alright,
but fright makes you sight all the things that ain't right.
You shun them and run away from them despite,
the thing that you're running from is deep inside.
And you need to do something 'cause you can't hide.
It's who you're used to, but you've got to decide
that who you want to be needs something untried.
If you don't try to trust you'll be alone,
with life passing by while you're sitting at home.
You want to try but you can't summon the fight.
Alone again, forever, saddest of sights.