these few days
sleep has been
something not so
easy to go in
i feel myself
drift off
for but a second
till a cough
or a sneeze
or an itch
wakes me up
from this ditch
and brings me back
into reality
sections at a time
then the sun shines at me
and really i go to sleep
for the serenity; the peace
but i find none
just black before my eyes
and a headache
i’m awake, just, in disguise
either that or
i’m awake somewhere else
in a dream or a nightmare
i’ve got to help myself
i never find myself
in that state of mind
being rested being well
i wish there to reside

Red, Orange, Yellow
These colours make me mellow
Green, Blue, Violet
One can say, the colours of silence
Indigo
This one cannot go
Though
I must admit
It is only fit
That in this metropolis
Of colours; not monotonous
They foster a sort of preponderance
Though when squished, form
A sort of colourful incontinence,
A bowel movement like this.
Because these colours, when mixed
Form a brown-ish bliss
A ***** abyss
Though ugly; something amiss
This uniqueness can’t be missed
I find myself lost in this
And I have no idea when to stop it
I’ll swallow my words down my oesophagus
To end this literary incompetence.

just as the wall wears away rubber
the wax burns from the flame
just as the black hole ***** out the light
a man withers from fame
the wall that you stick to
will never stick back
and the wax that you’ve lost
will never resurrect
so don’t spend your days
with one fish in the sea
wasting away
trying your best to see
whether your wall
or your fire
or your hole
will retire
from ******* the life
out of your poor poor soul
but i’m sure you and i know
this is an unreachable goal

look inside of me
and see that i am not afraid
to sink into the void
like a kid inside a cave
see through my weary eyes
and feel my shattering soul
know that i exist
and exist i do alone
look inside of me
and find a flickering flame
a sense of jealousy
envy like a mane—
— of fire around me
look in my eyes
and see that i wish
for a boy i hold dear
that he was mine
look inside of me
and know that i am tired
know that i wish for an embrace
or for myself to be desired
look inside of me
and see that i long for
somebody to love me
someone after or before

i am glass
i am shattered
i am invisible
i don’t matter
i am glass
i am pained
i am broken
i am stained.
see through me
as if i were a window
press against me
don’t care if your spindle—
—- like fingers
will shatter my
shattering soul
because what am i but glass?
i am all alone.
i am forgotten
i am see-through
so don’t even care
how much you will hurt me
with your glaring stare
don’t worry if you
ghosting me is ok
because why wouldn’t it be?
for glass that is stained.
punch through my heart
like a knife to my skin
don’t care if you hurt me
— i’m just like my kin!
i will shatter
i will part
i will break
and fall apart
but what does it matter
i’m only just glass

i’ve worked hard for you
so why is it hard to do?
to sprinkle a tiny smile here
and give me a little gratitude
i’ve showered you with love
and compassion in heavy amounts
yet somehow, and someway
the words don’t come outta your mouth
is a “thank you” too much to ask?
so whats clogging up your throat?
can’t you just say a word of thanks?
or an act of gratitude on that note.
why are the two words
always replaced
with an “ok” or a “why”
or a “so? anyways”?
i don’t really get
what’s going on in that head
but i guess i’ve got to accept it
and take the ‘thank you’ that’s unsaid