Darling,

I will never be able to completely comprehend the magnitude of your suffering.

Unfortunately I can not change your past.

And I know this is an annoying notion,
but your past has shaped you into who you are today.

But darling,

I promise to love every part of you and do my best to treat you the way you should have been treated your whole life.

A beautiful soul like you deserves to be worshiped.

Darling,

I want to witness how the ocean's breeze plays with your hair
and how your cheeks get slightly more pink from the heat.
I want to build sand castles
and pretend that they're life-size
...or better yet - not,
So that we could hide away inside their sandy walls,
pretending that life is but tiny speaks of gold.
I want to swim with you
and chase the waves.
Let's be two mermaids in love
and co-exist happily ever after.

I want you
To be mine

A friend asked me
how to be a writer.
I wanted to say,
lock yourself in a room,
scream until you have
a poem and no voice.
Open your veins and bleed
until you know that your bones
are pure words and sorrow.
Act as if you slit your own throat
and all you can bleed
are your own regrets
and all of the darkness
you boxed up for inspiration.
Write your mom a letter,
tell her you're leaving
and you won't be back for awhile
Because being a writer is traveling
through all seven layers of Hell
and denying anything is wrong.
Forget loving yourself
when all you have is a pen and paper
fused to your wrist
and Jesus is tapping at your skull
saying turn back now.
Warn the neighbors that if they smell burning
It's just your soul
clawing at the front door trying to get in.
Learn how to be alone.
Learn how to lose everything you have
in order to feel release,
learn how to only feel deceased
from now on.
A friend asked me
how to be a writer.
All I said was
don't

the best times I had
were the ones when I was in your arms
when you would say the sweetest things
and you wrote poetry about me
and it made me smile and blush
nothing had ever made me feel that way

I'm not perfect, but you always told me you'd love me no matter what
I believed you
and then, cut to a few days ago
sitting on a park bench
you said a few words
that will forever be engraved in my mind
I held back the tears
because I know you wouldn't want me to cry
but I promise, the second I was alone
those tears started flowing

I thought we'd be okay
I thought we were good
I thought you loved me