To the moon and back you professed. But…..
The Crescent moons edge drains me as it pierces my flesh.
To the moon and back you pledged. Only….
The new moon is heavy now, smothering, as it presses down on my chest.
To the moon and back you alleged. Except….
The full moons beam blinds me as it steals my fight .
Luminously I am led to my emotional death….
I love you to the moon and back, he said

I know the exact moments that you break through, and you are with me . I always love you for that.
I feel you totally at times and am overwhelmed in so many wonderful ways.I  really love you for that.
Pain wasn’t something you dealt . You were a love dealer ...I completely loved you for that .
I hate that you are gone still but I know you needed to go to be free .
I just don’t want to be free of you .
I still love you... even with that.

Illusion folds into reality twisting reason and undermining wisdom.
You confused me just to wear me down. This love isn’t real I whisper.
Barriers crashing exposing raw emotion, brand new, but not ready for the light
You broke through just to watch me fall. This love isn’t real I whisper.
Words lashing through the air finding me, landing like a million razors exposing my treasure
You cut me open just to watch me bleed. This love isn’t real I whisper.
Darkness settled in the space where fire was sworn with murmurs of love and hope
You deceived me just feel the heat die. But you have always known…. This love isn’t real.

You came to me in a wave.
Emotion dances on the swirling tips , enticing me to drown  in your depths.
I am the sea .
I am swallowed, but I am free.

Take me as your waves retreat after crashing on the sand.
I have waited for you .
I am less without you .
I am the sea.
I am swallowed, but I am free.

Lingering words like blades cutting hot flesh.
Interlocking flesh, wills remain separated.
My mind searches frantically for  something to cling to.
Words , memories , touches .
No surrender .
I survive ,I am alone , I am scarred and I am one.

Eyes wide, searching. Searching for the familiar in your eyes. Looking for a reflection of our home. Waiting for you to look back at me.

Steps turn to miles in the search for my soul , my life, my familiar . Miles and many lives searching for you. Will our search end in this one soon?

My hole grows bigger as the years slip by and I feel it's vastness is beginning to fill with loss and defeat.

My memory of you drives me still. Your breath on my face drives me. Our secrets drive me. The lost space drives me.

Eyes wide...searching. Still.

Buzzing buzzing
Silence breaks apart by sections
Leaping into time cubes
Time changing is always present
One section to the next
Condensing speeds of time reconciled
Buzzing still
The buzzing did not hold you
You hid
I stay Buzzing and I search.