I resent
The window for
Being more open then me

The poet lives two lives.
One on the outside,
And one in their mind.

When you look in their eyes
You could see an abyss.

If you looked long enough
You could sink into it.

But most people don’t see it.

Take the time to read the words, though,
And you would know for sure.

The poet lives in two different worlds.

I only see
The good in people
Because what else could
There be to see?

I'd run away
From all of you
To find myself
And live my truth

There wouldn't be
A problem left if only
She understood he
Wasn't the secret kept.

I left your anger
Tears and pettiness
Under my pillows to be
Collected by whatever God

Is there waiting for them.  
I will not be the one
Your insecurities and fears
Haunt. I cannot let You

Determine my future
When what was good for you
Cannot be my medicine. I smile
With all the brightness of

A million suns and I can't
Take your constant clouding
Of my judgement. If you don't
Know I love so differently then

You do then you haven't been listening to me.  I have been screaming so loudly for so long
My throat is raw with emotion.

I want to bathe until all of the things we have been through are boiled off. I want a skin only the sun and breeze have touched.

I used to write
My secrets in the sand,
Knowing they would never stay
Long enough to be told.

I used to just swim,
pulled my hair up and never
Really tasted the salt that foamed
After the crash.

I've ran in the sand,
Sure, but never have I
Ever let it smooth my
Skin into what it could be.

Before today, I've never
Let the current take me
Under and feel what it's like
To always come back to something.

there are days when the sun
hides behind curtains of cotton candy.

she's afraid of being judged too.
she thinks the moon won't like her.

on other days though,
she doesn't care.

she pushes through the cloudy barrier,
and shines.

she doesn't realise
that there's an entire solar system
cheering her on.

that people live for the days
where she appears
bringing happiness with every ray of sunshine.

- v.m