I replayed my side of the story
a different way,
every day you were gone.
Until saying nothing
became all I had to say.
No more stars in my eyes.
You were the eclipse to my sun.
You made it hard to shine.

No promises or guarantees
that I’m not crazy.
I know it’s only been a week,
so I haven’t told my shrink
how much you’ve grown on me

I can only wish my presence were enough to satisfy my absence.

I wish her smile wasn’t perfect,
that her laugh wouldn’t hypnotize.
I wish every greeting wouldn’t wave a sea of emotions within me and that she wasn’t kind.
I wish she would hurt me and not apologize.
To think that It took hers to finally see through a woman’s eyes.
I wish It wasn’t her presence that made my anguish subside.
I wish the pain wouldn’t diminish when she hugged me.
I wish she wasn’t her, I wish she were ugly.

It hurts to watch you
attempt to heal,
but it hurts even more
to watch the healing method fail.