I'd give up everything to kiss the moon

Just finished my watch.
Two long hours of staring into the emptiness of the world.
Can't seem to find the end.
Can't seem to see the light.
Mind-boggling.
Just finished my watch.
Two long hours of staring into the abyss of my ****** up soul.
Trying to find answers to questions that have been crawling through the cavities of my skull since time immemorial.
Hitting plateaus at questions I try to answer.
Then the sudden realisation hits me like a freight train.
Pointless.
Floating away from the abyss and onto the working parts.
Trying to paint the cerebral walls of my skull with thoughts of euphoria.
Plans of the future.
The feeling is astounding.
Racing through my thoughts.
Feeling every atom of this exhilirating make believe.
Every particle of this blissful rapture.
And then, like an architect that gets a kick, I snap back.
Snap back to the emptiness.
Snap back to the despair.
Snap back to reality.
Logic and reason take immediate action trying to tranquillise me before shock and fear of realisation of this fake reality take over.
Trying to show me that thoughts of the future are dangerous.
And hesitantly, Im obliged to agree with them.
******* ******.

Oh I just wanna get out of this cattle call to life
Go into the store filled pastures that used to be the wolf’s woods
so I can be the sheep

and the peddlers wear the skin of my sacred spirit animal
Oh, oh
The peddlers wear the skin of my sacred spirit animal
Oh, oh

Once, I dreamed I was running from a killer
in a faux artisan grocery store
Just when I thought I was beat
a wolf pup came, spurred me on
and distracted my would be murderer

and the peddlers wear the skin of my sacred spirit animal
Oh, oh
The peddlers wear the skin of my sacred spirit animal
Oh, oh

In 1600 and something
they turned her woods to a moonscape
They fenced in the chickens, and when a wolf ate one
they put up a poster
saying she ate their child

and the peddlers wear the skin of my sacred spirit animal
Oh, oh
The peddlers wear the skin of my sacred spirit animal

They shoot the blackbirds
In locked cages
For singing of living freely.
They say
"No! No! No!
Those birds are insane
Bums
Losers
Dead to society.
Now,
Go to work
Go to school
Stop at stop signs
Marry
Have children
And pay taxes."
But I heard the lunatic chirping
Riding on the echo
Of a shotgun blast
It said
"Nothing really matters
And the people aren't as important
As they think.
The boundaries they set
Never really existed.
Now quit your job
Throw your wallet in the garbage
And run naked in the streets"
It sounded beautiful
And I can't seem
To get its ringing
Out of
My skull.
How long should I
Pluck
These black feathers
Of mine?