Have I messed things up
by talking about feeling?
Should I comment on weather or stare at the ceiling?
Should I only talk cars or financial aspirations?
Avoiding those corny heartfelt declarations?
Does it make you feel awkward to discuss future plans?
If this is the case, I must sadly embrace that the truth of the matter is, you’re not my man.
Everything dies I heard her say
As she was finding her way after
Losing the one who made her want to stay
But wait! Hold onto life, there will come a day when the journey leads you to a new path.
Everything is dark, I heard her say
As she was grappling with the pain, straining against the breath in her chest, restlessly searching for an end to this mess.
Hold on. Wasn’t there darkness when he came along? There was a time when ending it all seemed to be the answer and the question, why even exist?
Look at what you would have missed.
To the one I adore,
More, more, more!
The lighthouse stands firm
Guiding me to safe waters
Anchoring my heart.
Sitting by his bedside
Consulting with the Fates
Will this be his time to go?
To rattle Pearly Gates?
He seems to be so fragile
And yet the spirit’s there!
Disguised by sagging jowls
And age spots, hiding in grey hair.
The afterlife has been discussed
He’s scoffed at it and said
What do I care? Burned or buried?
I’ll be dead!
I watch him in his frailty
Yet strong-willed as can be
He clings to life with stubbornness,
Neither of us ready
To speak of things to come
We focus on the monitors,
The air vents’ harmless hum.
The ordering of breakfast
And peeing in a cup,
The trolley and it’s offerings
Upon which we both sup.
The future is unknown now
So we resign to be
Contented in the moment and
Embrace the mystery.
The choice is not for us to make
whatever we believe
So quiet words of love are whispered
With our hearts on sleeve.
Waiting now is our new game,
Though we, the pawns and Kings
Pronounce that it ain’t over
‘Til that fat lady sings!
A few days later he was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. It’s as if we knew.
Standing on the fringe of a feeling
Reeling from the heady sense of vertigo
Only one place to go
And I’m falling fast.
Autumnal leaves fall
forming amber mounds
Those stunning hues of amber, crimson and burnt sienna!