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But when the night was cold
And my mind was in chaos

You were nowhere to be seen...
  Dec 2022 Writing of the Unknown
Ameed
I don't care
I never did
I never will

I don't care about the stabs
I don't care about the lies
I don't care about the loss

I never did
I never will

I don't care about you abandoning me in the middle of nowhere or making me doubt every single person I meet or forcing me to look at the mirror and despise the foolishness I had.

I don't care about all the above.

I try to convince myself every night that I don't.
But, I do;
I fully keenly wholesomely do care and my care was my doom.
© Ameed
So swift you slither
So sweet you wait
So caring you chase my dreams away

Awaking me in a rush
my mind was in complete chaos
until I realized it was just a dream

Just something simple
that makes me stay awake
for fear of what you will show

darkest parts of my mind
swift and simple action
maybe one day, I will get sleep once more
Normal people hope for love
They hope for dreams
Hope for fanesty to be real

Others hope for basic necessities
Understanding from another
Far and few dreams to be

But I hope for one thing
Something so small
Many would laugh at

I hope
Not to be broken
Once more

By person
By action
Or by thing

I wish not to feel the gut rentching pain
That is hope crashing to the ground
Shattering to dust

Is that so much to ask
Not to be broken once more?
Type little words
1's and 0's
hidden on a server somewhere

Pay a little fortune
for needed help
Which is needed to live

Does anything really mater
when everything is left
to someones else choice
on what happens with our words or life?
She had a chest of drawers
Longings from ankle up
Paper chips of lips
A made up mind of shells and nuts

She was unceremoniously
civil
Quick to  wink
Hand chilling icebergs
An immitation belt made of mink

She sang blues in pink
While spitting out punk
Indifferent to age
Pure as road **** skunk

"It's my life , I'll do what I wanna!"
As they put her in Paddy
Drove her insanely station
"Come now my Laddie!"
Too thin
Too fat
Too caring
Too much hate
Too small
Too tall
Too bright
Too dull
Too smart
Too dumb
Too stupid
Too young
Too new
Too old
Too meak
Too strong

All lies I tell myself everyday
But I know their lies
Then how do I stop a cycle of self hate?
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