Noname

Noname Nov 2019

Am I kidding myself ?
Can either of us truly change?
Or am I wasting time
Unhappy
Drowning in a pool of tears
Will he ever want to make me happy?
And will I ever want to accept who he is ?
My heart is in my throat
As I think of these truths
I just ate a half a pizza
And I'm still sad
I just screamed at my daughter
Because I'm alone
It's not her fault
She misses her daddy
She's acting out
Sometimes
It's just hard
He's not here
Even when he is........
And I cant think of anything positive other than
I just love him
And I want him to be a better man
And I want us to grow old together
And I want us to look back at our long life and all our children and our house and animals
And be proud
But I still just don't know
If I can make it
I just love him
And I don't know when it's going to stop hurting and when my body will tell me what to do

Noname Nov 2019

Tweakers

My neighbors stay up all night
Doing ****
Slapping music
Talking loudly
And I remembered
For a slight minute what it feels like to live with no responsibility
Without meaning
How terrifying
How I'd sit alone in solitude
Hoping for something
And I wanna call the police because
I work
They don't
They live off the government
Do drugs
And get there children taken away
But I listen and let them be
Because, I don't know why
I feel bad in some ****** up *** way

Noname Nov 2019

Great

These are only my feelings
Only.....
They just spew out of me
Can't control them
Can't even filter
Just type them
If they make sense or not
Here they are
And I stink
And I'm sad
And I'm tired
But I'm thirsty
And wondering
And I am happy sometimes
But mostly I'm confused
And you'd think
Seeing them with my own two eyes would help
Yet it only makes me more confused
And I'm okay
I'll always be okay
I'm just waiting to be great

Noname Nov 2019

Untitled

It's not just ***
Not just touching yourself when you please
It's your mind
What you've been thinking
What you've thought
What you've lost
Sometimes your never in that frame of mind and it haunts you
Because you want it
Want touch want pleasure
But you can't fathom
You can't feel
It's isolating
Un relatable
When your truly unhappy with yourself
Nothing is ****

Nov 2019

Lilly F

healing you with my hurt

rivers flow from my eyes as
you bathe yourself in them,
letting my tears water your ego

©L.F.

my tears watered your ego

#ego #tears #water #hurt #pain #sad #help

Noname Nov 2019

Time travel

Music itself is time travel
Each song I hear is a capsule
Of somewhere I've been
Somewhere happy
Or sad
Somewhere exciting
And it fills me with endless joy
Joy I couldn't find in anything else
Memories that couldn't be recollected
From a picture or a story
Little snapshots of sound
Brings a whole cinematic experience
Inside your brain that no one else can see or replicate
Something so beautiful and real and refreshing
You don't have to see it or hold it
It's special in a way that can never be explained
It creates a calmness inside you
Makes you grateful for where you've been and where you are now
The feeling I get when the base shakes my core is something I'll never get over
Music saves me daily

Noname Oct 2019

Come to me

I want to feel you
All around
Want to look to you for guidance
I want a reason for being here right now
Want to be surrounded by people that make me proud
I embarrassed by the thought
So disgusted by my absence
I try to gather information
Try and figure out which group would fit me
But it is me who needs to mold myself
But where do I begin
And how do I make that move
And will you love me
Even if I've been wrong in my past
Even if I've told people you were wrong
Will you love me as I find you?