You are all I see
Yet your voice, is like a bullet
You fill up my days
Yet I despise that fact

I cannot leave
Or even move slightly apart
I am caught in the web
That I don't know if you know you wove.

People often use the term "home is where the heart is" as reference that home is a literal place. That you can touch it, feel it, live in it and it's physically there. But I just can't seem to wrap my mind around that. Because my heart belongs to a home that isn't there in a physical sense. My home is the way you say my name and draw circles on my lower back. My home is built and structured in between your arms and in the crook of your neck. I've never felt more at home then when we are skin to skin and I want to pull you even closer. No my home is not a building, my home is you and that's where my heart will always be.

"I went to the hospital"
        I remember
"I wanted to stop breathing so you'd come back"
        Don't say that
"I whispered your name when I was asleep"
        You did?
"That's what I was told when I woke up"
       You always have talked in your sleep
"I wanted you to come back"
        *I never wanted to leave

tragedy has made me silent.

he crept down my throat
and softly snipped away at my voice;
now there is nothing.

i smile and nod
smile and nod
smile and smile
and nod and nod
falling asleep in plain sight
watching your lips move in speech
wishing mine would follow suit

tragedy has made me silent,

made me timid
made me grow in stature until i am awkward
gangly
always in the way
hiding behind
a shorter sister
but still a sore thumb

a quiet
quaking
obvious protrusion
i invoke conversation
but it dies out
with the smile in my eyes
the bobbing of my head
the silence of my lips

tragedy has made me silent.