if love feels like
salt water eyes
empty beds
heavy hearts
wet pillows
red scars
shaky hands
quivering lips
dark circles
sleepless nights
worry worry worry

I don't want love at all

my body
is still my body
even after
you have left your fingerprints
behind

Fairytales are stories that never finished. That was the last thing I said to you as I walked away. Our story had an ending. An ending like a car crash. Like knowing the train is coming but it felt more comforting to stay parked on those tracks. Sifting my fingers threw your hair as you looked up at the stars and I just couldn't seem to look away from you.
I smiled as you slept and we laid under the stars that night. You would soon tell me that the weekend you went out with your friends you made a huge mistake. I imagined burning buildings and sirens. You told me another man had explored your body. I imagined you inside of the burning building.
I remember the hours after like smoke filling my lungs. You pleaded your love for me and the amount of sorries said were like cutting through glass. You had told me "you're my fairytale ending!" As I walked away and imagined that burning building getting ready to collapse, I tell you, fairytales are stories that never finished.

You bring the color to my eyes
Giving life to an empty form
On the canvas stretched by God’s hands
paint me something beautiful

Rock me to the harmony of your soul
I cannot help but dance
to the rhythm of your love
as it sings the hymn of my heart

This is how most of us live
pale and translucent
secrets kept in graves
wolves tending at old wounds
ghosts among the ashes.

My curse is

I cannot hide my eyes
from the fire in your flesh.
I wander into dreams
where shadows are your body
wind, your silhouette
my breath, your fractures.
This house tastes of old bouquets
burnt letters, tired words (gnawing),

an endless ocean,

repeating
I, too, have cracks -- 
cold and deep.