trapped between reality and nightmare
between truth and lies
a constant war in my mind
I cannot fight it with my dusty hands

trying to save myself seems useless
I am but a hollow soul
a darkness in those around me
a crying of despair
a lost cause
no need to be
no need to breath
my legacy is just a wall
with no entering doors
I feel
I dream
I hope sometimes
but i know
I matter not.

in this world
there's only place for light
darkness shall be left
behind.

These days I get lost more often that not
In a labyrinth of escaping echos,
They belch out obscene words, each one left
Behind like red hot embers for me to pick up.
I strip myelf bare before you today, to say:
I will not be outshined, I will not 
be swallowed whole,
not by any of the black holes you hurl towards me like
shooting stars
(Come now dear, close your eyes and make a--)
Wishes don't come true by wishing.
You don't scare me, don't you
see? The monster under my bed I used to hide from--
its just a part of your hurricane heart
I get it now, 
now that time has healed those scars, leaving 
in its place opalescent stars--
You, 
you were just the by-product of tear-stained pillows and 
the (not so) occasional broken bottle

I strip myself bare before you today, to say:
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry my monsters were gaping mouths and mocking eyes, and yours--
yours were tangible fury and broken bones
slurred words and hollow tones I'm so
so sorry.
 
I strip myself bare before you today to tell you: 
I forgive you.

I am an astronaut
Not because I trained for years
In high-tech NASA facilities
Not because I'm a peak physical specimen
Endurance tested
Intelligence too
I am an astronaut
And its a reason as simple as this
I made someone my world
And then she left me

I am an astronaut
And right now I'm drifting through space
I can see the stars
I just can't reach them