You said you were ugly, you are not.
You said you were worthless, you are not.
You said you were sad and broken, let me help you out.
You said you were feeling down and depress, I'll fix you up.

You make my emotions function continuously, you still do.
You make me loyal with no feeling of remorse, you still do.
You made me feel that there's no one else, you still do.
You left me there standing all alone, you still do.

You are the one that I will keep fighting for, that is my oath.
You are the one that I'm willing to fix, forever and ever.
You are the one that I still wish for, my only dream.
You are the one that can make me fall, my one weakness.

You keep diminishing your self worth, I still believe in you.
You keep saying you are not worth it, I'll make you think otherwise.
You finally recovered from you broken state, I'm very proud of you.
You denied me access to be part of your world, you still do....

Dad, I am going to try and write this
It may be a poem
It may not
But from my heart
I miss you
I remember the last time I kissed you
Your eyes were closed
They opened wide
As I kissed your forehead
In that terrible place
So white and clean
Where people die
But you will never die
Dad
I love you so much
And you will always live on
In my heart
Forever
God, I miss you so much
It's so hard to write through the tears

A hole was dug for me when I was 21
I happily died in it
I helped dig it.

Is this bliss?
I think heartbreak exists within my chest
Sometimes it emerges as bile
It tastes like sugar and sea water
Sometimes it is warm and thick on my tongue

You bit off a budded magnolia for me at the branch
You exposed the inner bark so it could drink up iced water

i need to stop
setting myself on fire
to keep you warm.

My mind is blown.
Destroyed.
I'll never recover.
Ever.