A wordsmith sits patently
Sharpening and refining his tools.
He listens and he waits
For the deadly moment,
Knowing exactly when to strike.
He unsheathes his sword,
Pointing expertly towards his prey.
Words of shining steel
Slice through the air
Landing with intent,
Cutting with precision,
Twisting with malice,
Into this bleeding heart
Of mine.

An exceptional poet encapsulates the human condition from their own experience.
But the pain of realising how much you have hurt someone,
How worn out they are because of you,
Is almost too much to bear.

What’s important is Today,
Not what went before,
Or what may happen,
Don’t waste your time on these imposters both.

Living in a world of my own,
Bound in beguiling threads
In an intricately tapestried mind map,
Always thinking,
Rarely living,
Socially isolated,
Socially inept,
A prisoner of my mind,
Falling down never ending rabbit holes
Into boundless oceans of despondency and despair,
Paralysed by confusion,
An assault on the senses,
Suffocating,
Unable to breathe.

A familiar light shines in the distance,
I swim towards it,
Limbs thrashing,
One stroke forward,
Two strokes back,
One stroke forward,
One stroke back,
Two strokes forward,
One stroke back,
Slowly, slowly,
Closer and closer,
Until I reach the life raft and arms of my saviour,
Who never gave up hope of finding me again,
Even in the darkest hours.

Conversation inhibited,
Yet also free of constraint,
Small talk a challenge,
In depth conversation my forte
And interrogation my ally
Bombarding others with quick fire questions,
‘You’re too deep’ it has been said more than once
As I reveal too much once again.

Misunderstanding social cues,
Eye contact a no no,
****** expressions a blur,
Tone of voice a trigger,
Hence emotions a minefield.

Literal listening,
Literal speaking,
Leading to sense of humour bypass,
Don’t waste your innuendos, irony and sarcasm on me,
Direct speaking is what wins the day.

Overwhelming sensory overload,
Confusion,
Misunderstanding,
Mishearing,
Tendency towards negativity,
Introversion,
A war of words
Inside my head
Pouring out my mouth,
Tearing me apart
And those whom I love.

Now working hard to change the script,
To be aware of the impact of deficiencies, defensiveness and quirkiness,
To remain level headed and mindful
As I alternate between tiptoeing and running roughshod
Through the labyrinth of life.

All my life
Living under a cloud of doom and fear and negativity,
Believing I was deficient in some way,
I’d done something really bad,
But knowing not what.

Guilt now in tatters,
Shame no longer around,
Worry retreating,
As I finally discover
All I’m guilty of
Is being

Socially
Inept!

Trees swaying,
Leaves rustling,
Buzzards soaring.
Wind’s delicate caressing touch,
Autumn sun’s warming golden rays
Filtering through the trees
Onto the woodland floor.
Peace and silence reigns
In between birds’ angelic song
Of gratitude and praise
Drawing the day to a close.