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I love when traffic flows like dreams –
said nobody ever, in rush hour screams.
And Mondays? A warm embrace.
Especially with deadlines breathing in your face.

“Please, more spam emails,” they plead with grace –
said nobody ever, not one trace.
I cherish the printer’s stubborn stall,
mid-report, mid-panic, down the hall.

Dishwater coffee, ambrosia divine –
said nobody ever, not even in line.
And meetings that could've been one line of text,
are truly the moments I cherish the next.

Oh joy, another group chat ping! –
said nobody ever, in the midst of a meeting.
There's nothing like socks lost in the wash,
or autocorrect turning love into squash.

But still we smile, and carry on,
with half-done mornings and the curtains drawn.
For life’s absurdities have a clever tether:
they’re oddly poetic - said nobody ever.
I

She exits herself on the
Sofa. Blanket, dog, and bits
Of a poem on a pad of paper

On the table, like a half-eaten
Piece of homework.
Shades of wine on her sleeping

Lips. Exits herself; space-walks
Outside that frame of mind she's
Been expected to hang herself

On the wall within; she knows
There is more.
There has to be more.

II

She has to be more.
Like so many writers, she falls
Asleep working. Sometimes

Works to fall asleep.
Digging her way through
Herself, mining for words,

Hacking away at painful pasts,
Gathering emerald experiences.  
Diamond doubts and ruby

Regrets all fuel her poetry.
And she reads, spotlight kissed;  
Audience adored,

Goosebump summoning; hairs
On arms and necks stand up as
She whispers directly to me.

About me. Because of me.
In front of everybody.
To music, and I've brought a box

Of pins, and between each of her
Every word, I drop one. And I
Swear to the gods, you can hear

Them all. Like the unsteady
Ticking of a clock too cool to
Care.

III

Poetry jewelry; set with stones
From her innermost. Chips of
Gold from her heart melted

Down to a key pendant she
Holds in her hand; chain dangling,
Eyes closed, forehead resting

Against a door she knows it is
Time to open. Key in one hand,
Pen in the other,

She
Enters
Herself.
When I was young
Before I felt foreign lips on mine
Cracked the spine of the good book
Saw myself in the mirror
I sat at the window and wished on stars
I wanted fairy wings
a big white horse
a new pair of shoes
Now I am older
Not old enough to whither in wet soil
Old enough to sign my name
To run from large men
To billow smoke
Older still every day
Until there is no older left to be
Until there are no stars left
And shoes don’t run
And horses are too high to reach
Dawn breaks, too early, a hollow sound,
My sleep undone, on restless ground.
Your absence echoes, a constant ache,
Each waking moment, for your sake.

I tried to push, to feel the cold,
Of silence given, a story told.
But fear outweighs, a lonely dread,
That you are lost, words left unsaid.

Your Whispered Truths, I hold them tight,
Against the shadows of the night.
My mind spins tales, of what might be,
Then trust prevails, you'll come to me.

Our pasts entwined, a fragile grace,
A bond we formed, in time and space.
A reason hides, behind the veil,
Let not that reason, make us fail.

You are my world, my beating core,
Without your light, I'm nothing more.
A fading breath, a darkened sky,
A broken heart, where dreams all die.

I seek to lift, to bring you cheer,
But distance breeds, a rising fear.
My words descend, to somber tone,
A heavy weight, I bear alone.

My love persists, a burning flame,
This ride we share, beyond all blame.
First touch, first kiss, a future bright,
Awaits us still, in morning's light.

I'll wait, I'll write, I'll hold you near,
Until you speak, and banish fear.
Please, let me know, what holds you fast,
Let this dark silence, be the last.

Each day a letter, sent with care,
A silent plea, upon the air.
If you desire, I'll walk away,
Just speak the word, and end this day.
The shadows seem real to me
Do I work for the KGB?
Why is the sun always following me?
If you will just let me be
I have schizophrenia
Or is it all just make-believe
I’m left living with schizophrenic tendencies
Trying to live this life-Maybe I’m ready for the next…..
I didn’t really wanna die
My life is one big mess
Take the blade away
Away from me before I plunge it deep
I’m contemplating suicide but only scratched my cheek
Yes, take this blade away from me
Before I fall down and black out
Agony is all I see as I turn to lash out
I promise I’m not afraid of the secrets that I keep
I’m left feeling kinda burnt out
Their haunting me
Like I’m some sort of creep
A monster
They’re watching me even as I speak
My mother believes that I’m a good son
She believes she can see past all the horrible things I have done
Little does she know
I’m not anything as good as her other one
The definition of failure
I don’t compare to the good son
I am the black sheep
Always on the run
The white ghost of all the horrid things I have done
Haunting everything in front of me
Made a mess of my life
Everything you see
Schizophrenia is horrible
A disgusting disease
In my head there is no room for me
A wolf in sheep’s clothing
To the sickness I am bound
Something is wrong with my head
I’d be better off dead
Just take the blade away from me
Stop the damage already done
I’m begging you on my knees
Which Version of me do you believe?
Schizophrenic catastrophe
I’m begging someone to help me please
Defeat the ghosts and demons that I see
All the pain that lives inside of me
I’ve struggled here for so long or  maybe I haven’t tried enough
I am a freak
Afraid to speak
All I really wanted was someone to believe
Just to give a little ****
I have waited here for so long but nobody ever showed up
I have schizophrenia that is inspiration behind this poem. Nothing more nothing less. I really hope you enjoy it. If you do leave some feedback please or if you feel better and different about it leave some feedback, please
There was a time not so long ago when my head hung down and my spirits were low
Forever in a funk and moving slow
I needed a pick-me-up to help me go
My spirits were crushed and I had no faith in trust
Down on myself and feeling pretty low
My back against the wall with nowhere to go
God came calling
He showed himself to me
In all of his glory, he made me see
How much better life can be……
If I believe in his story
Believe in his faith
Believe in the sacrifices that he made
So.....
I can live each day better than the rest
No longer broken beaten and depressed
I can live without worry
Without hate
In Jesus name, God is great!
Up until recently, when I was diagnosed with cancer, I had lost my faith and all belief in a higher power during that time of being faithless I was left, wondering what was out there for me when that day comes and at some point, I begin to realize it’s a pretty empty feeling I can’t tell you exactly what made me. Find my faith again but if you’re reading this poem, you can obviously see that it has entered my life once again in a big way, and I find comfort in knowing that there is someone watching over us, and when my time comes no matter how soon or far away that is, I will be at peace in the next life, even if you don’t believe in the good Lord above, just know that I am praying for you and I’ve got enough faith for us all.
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