Where do I go to watch the flowers bloom?
Or not feel alone in a crowded room?
Can I reach the stars?
Or is it too far?
Am I getting back some of my lost heart?
I want to find a better piece of mind,
But it always feels like I’m running out of time.
I wish I didn’t spend so much time fearing my demise.
But I can never feel alive unless there’s sunlight.
So why do I spend my time alone with the moon?
It only gives way for more gloom to consume.
I guess I just need to figure out what to do.
Until I can travel among the sunrise into a brighter hue.

Falling.
What happened to my mind?
A rhythm I can’t recognize.
Why can’t I get up?
I keep slipping away.
What about these wounds?
The fight was always unfair.
Now I’m left gasping for air.
Where do I run to?
I feel like I’m losing myself completely and I don’t know who’s left.
So why am I trapped?
They say the truth sets you free.
But the masquerade covers it up and ignores my pleas.
Why can’t I be free?
Why can’t I figure out what I need?
Is death really the only salvation for me?
I want to find someone.
But who could ever love someone like me?

The storm is here and I’m stuck enduring it.
I want to disappear, but I’m stuck in a pit.
Will I be able to overcome?
At least I’m no longer numb.
But how am I supposed to live with this?
It’s only a matter of time before my palm splits.

I see you everywhere but beside me,
the one place that I need you the most.
I don’t know if you’ve just felt like hiding,
but it feels like I’m being stalked by a ghost.
I think of my life consisting of just time biding,
with parasitic emptiness and I’m the host.
This hits me like waves I am meant to be riding,
and it follows me persistently from coast to coast.

The grass didn’t seem so green back then
I guess all that constant rain did pay off,
‘cause now this little future’s just a casual friend,
and my god looking back the past was soft.
It’s not like I always want to be drenched in sorrow,
I find I look much better in brown, blue or grey,
you know I’d trade in every tomorrow
for just one more yesterday.

I hear every voice but yours in my ears,
the deafening noise has made me forget that sound,
since I’ve heard that sweet melody it’s been too many years,
and every other pitch makes my static brain pound.
I’m always biting my lip but now I’m fighting tears,
I shake my head side to side and around.
I’m quickly losing stamina from battling my fears
and now looking forward to my hole in the ground.

The skies never seemed clear and blue back then,
it turns out that I was the creator of each cloud,
I’m hoarding past calendars so that I can pretend
that I’m back in time and making everyone else proud.
If you’ve got a hour or two that I can borrow,
I swear I’m good for it and whatever price; I’ll pay,
‘cause you know I’d trade in every tomorrow
for just one more yesterday.

I feel you all over, laced in everything,
if it wasn’t such a curse, it’d be a gift.
You’re the peace in winter and the hope in spring,
you’re the summer sun and autumn’s winds so swift.
I’m relieving every memory, looking for a place to cling,
I remember all of the details but the clarity is now adrift.
Side to side, back and forth, I constantly swing,
it pulls and drags me down but it can also give the highest lift.

The sun never seemed to shine right back then,
but maybe I was just too busy looking for artificial light.
I was never one for second looks but I should’ve searched again,
because everything I wanted was already in my sight.
So I plant a seed hoping it will eventually grow
and I sculpt all I wish for with clay,
‘cause you know I’d trade in every tomorrow
for just one more yesterday.

Maybe someday I’ll meet someone with galaxies behind their eyes.
Maybe we’ll get lost gazing at the stars.
Maybe their soul will feel effervescent.
But until then I’ll stare at the moon, waiting to find some meaning in this universe.
Maybe someday I’ll feel the sun shine it’s warm rays and I won’t be so alone.
Maybe someday the constellations will make sense and I’ll finally find my way home.
But until someday comes I’ll just keep wondering.