You never tell me I'm the best
So I assume I'm the worst
Never tell me you love me
So I assume my life is loveless
You don't ask to hang out
So I assume I am uninteresting
These are the sad truths of myself
The sad truths of many
Our importance measured by our interactions with others
Our self-worth weighing so heavily upon the words spoken to us
Whether it be an abundance of hate
A lack of love
Or nothing at all
You give me nothing and my mind turns it into everything.

Sunshine boys
Smiles shining brightly
So pretty to look at
Laughing at the simple and silly things like young boys
Music to my ears
Dimples and reddened cheeks
They radiate a special warmth
A warmth that could make anyone feel special
But sometimes that warmth gets hotter and hotter
As I get closer and closer
And my heart starts beating faster and faster
I’m so close it hurts
I touch you
It burns
My skin is melting and I can’t breathe
You see that’s how it is with sunshine boys
So pretty and bright and warm
You wanna stare at them and feel they’re warmth all day long
But they’re meant to be enjoyed from afar
Get too close and you’ll be burned to the bone
For being too selfish
For trying to keep the sun for yourself
So I’ll remain on the ground
With my sunhat and spf
Enjoying the sunshine boys
From afar

For me
Love is a weight
A heavy one at that
Causing an infestation in my heart
Weighing down my chest
And eating away at my heart
I mistake biting for the soft tickle of butterflies
Self destruction hidden behind every infatuation
It's dangerous