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Amanda Powell Jan 2018
Today I ate war for breakfast.  

It tasted stale like old newspapers and when I bit down I heard a story that kept repeating itself.

I only eat it because I heard it’s good for me.  
“Most important meal of the day” they say.  
“Makes you stronger”

The sound of my spoon hitting the concave bowl like shots fired from a shaky finger,
unsure of the aim and even more unsure of the reason for the target.

By lunchtime I was hungry for more.  

I guzzled down a few hate crimes, they’re not the easiest things to swallow.
Innocent people don’t go down without a fight.  

I’m never sure why I torture myself with consuming all these things that are bad for me.  

“You are what you eat” they say.

Now I’m becoming ill from this junk food drowning in the pit of my stomach.  

I have to eat supper even though I’m afraid of what’s being served.  
Looks like it’s injustice with a side of inequality.  

My least favorite meal.

Tears march down my face following the fate of my food down the curve of my neck.
I feel nauseous from eating and guilty from being full.

That night I have heartburn like many nights before
but for the first time I smile.
Everything that was forced down from the day is
defying gravity,
defying the odds and
defying the evil so it can stay alive,
rise up again and eject from its captor.

I ***** war,
I ***** hate crimes,
I ***** injustice and inequality

They burn on the way up and they are not happy…….but I am.  

Every day we are fed news and are given a choice.
Will you swallow it down and let it pass or change the recipe and nourish the world?

Amanda Powell
1/22/2017
Amanda Powell Jan 2018
I’m sick of fuckboys saying they’re messed up themselves so they always mess up themselves while messing with myself.

Hold your hands out while I lay down the most vulnerable parts of me.  The parts I keep like presents labeled “do not open until this date”.

Like an excited child you rip open the wrapping paper like finger nails across my skin and I get a taste of the pain you’re about to give to me.

Next, you tear open the box.  This box! that contains the most vulnerable parts of me.  I feel my heart ripping open.  The cracking of the cardboard mimics the cracking of my ribs over my pounding heart.  

You look down into my vulnerable parts as I hold my breath.  
“Wow...thanks….you shouldn’t have”

You speak the truth about one thing.  I shouldn’t have.

You look around and say “I forgot to get you anything”

I think “it’s the thought that counts” but the problem is counting your thoughts only takes one hand.

One hand that I use to take my box back until I can lay it down in front of someone that looks down, smiles and says
“I got you the same thing”

8/18/2016 Amanda Powell
Amanda Powell Jan 2018
My friend and I have names for each other when we need to channel our inner divas.  Mine is Beyonce Pad Thai.

Beyonce Pad Thai doesn’t care what you think because she’s too busy caring about what she thinks!

Beyonce Pad Thai doesn’t put up with your **** because **** is literally digested waste and she demands undigested life.  The life you use to the fullest without any waste!

Beyonce Pad Thai has goals you didn’t even know were possible.  She knows they’re possible because she writes them down every. single. day.  She works towards them every. single. day. and the universe gives her exactly what she asks for.

Beyonce Pad Thai doesn’t take offense to your words because she knows words come out of us and therefore they live in us and when we exhale them they’re more about us than the person they hit on the way out.

Beyonce Pad Thai is so awesome and fun she knows time spent with her is a gift.  When she gives you that gift and your lack of appreciation is apparent she has no problem taking it away and giving that gift to others.

Beyonce Pad Thai is done talking about you now.  She wants to find herself, in the crack of a newly opened book, in the b flat of a new flute song, in the sizzling sounds of a new recipe, in the times new roman of a dream job offer, in the middle of a twirl during her new favorite song, in the new comfort outside her comfort zone.  


10/22/2016 Amanda Powell

— The End —