We run like telephone poles in the night
Darting through trees
Snaking through the sky

Reaching for the moon on our long wooden legs
Oh, how glorious we are with the moonlight glistening off of us

Beating with power
Pulsing with electricity
Arching through the air and lighting up the world around us.

Chasing an impossible dream to be fulfilled

To make that spark,
To rope in the magic suspended in the space around us.
And light the match.

That cultivates our spirit
Grounds our hopes
Cements them in the earth and
Buries them in the deep rich soil

Never to be questioned or second guessed

Oh how we grasp the air,
desperate to grab handfuls of somethings and turn them into everything
And change the world with the love and positivity we create.

How we long for the semblance of perfection amount the modern robots that surround us, rehearsing their phrases and learning the script of movie stars and socialites.
Rewriting their picturesque lives into our own realities.

And those people suspended higher then the rest of us-
constantly reminding us to jump higher,
Duck lower
Smile wider
Dip Deeper
Explore more
Love harder
Dance better
Filter everything
Raise heels
Tighten jeans
Laugh longer
Try harder

We take advantage of the miles of possibilities lining country roads and lighting up cities
Always expecting more of yourself and expecting less.

Struck down by the lighting rod of life
And burning from the inside out with unharvested potential.
Crumbling with the weight of our possibilities

And tumbling to the ground,
severed from our hopes and dreams.

Cutting off our influence
Shutting down the light in our world
And draining our surroundings of power.

Where we rot and wait for someone with a name tag and an antidote to prescribe us with a dose of energy.

Oh, how we chase our dreams into the ground

How we expect so much and accomplish so little.
How we fight for every breath to live out the ideal destiny dreamed up by society.

We run like telephone poles in the night.
Pulsing with energy and trying our best to light up the world.

Did you find it sad
That we went from
Watching horror movies at 7am
Leaning against each other
And hiding smiles
To never smiles
Unless it was sarcasm
That was shot down by the other
Then mocked by their friends.
For a second there you had me
I almost trusted you
I almost told you why I found this moment special
Because I went from tearing my hair out
To laughing more often
But just as I was about to let you in
I got shut out.
Everything subsided
I started blasting music alone
While you criticized every move I made
Behind my back.
But don't act like I never knew that
Because I did
Word travels fast between mutual friendships.
I got used to being alone again
But the only thing that still hurts me
Is that I didn't say goodbye that evening
Because I thought we'd see each other this way again
You didn't say goodbye that evening
Because you knew it was going to be over.
Oh, how I wish I had the courage
To walk up to you
Look you in the eye
And say
"Goodbye"
And when you ask why I bothered
I'd respond
"I never had a reason to before.
So goodbye
My old painkiller
You kept me up way too many nights
Wondering
What I did
That was so wrong."

Fire is a useful tool,
But fire is a curse,
It eliminated the worthless things,
But makes the bleeding worse.

Fire kisses everything,
From wooden logs to fingertips,
I prefer to hold onto fire,
It provides a sharper bliss.

My heartaches will still continue,
I've given them all I've got,
But no amount of fire,
Will make this worthless bleeding stop.

Don't you know the feeling?
Hating what makes you feel alive?
Don't you love the adrenaline?
It should have killed you, but you survived.
How many years have gone by since that day?
Has the thought ever crossed your mind?
Through all of my taunting and singing and loving and needing,
I've always wanted to die.

I make exchanges with the devils,
So God will forget my sins,
The list will keep on growing,
But I refuse to let Satan win.
I still have hope in this life,
But all the same I'm numb,
You don't deserve to see this,
The monster I've become.

I'm not afraid of dying,
Just of losing you,
A life without you is meaningless,
There's nothing I can do,
So I will hold your hand tightly,
Guide you into the light,
Because even in the darkness,
Your soul is burning bright.

I am fragile.
But I am strong.

You are Alive,
but struggle to stay standing.

You have Spirit,
But only on the days vulnerability and insecurity aren't constant companions.

But my world has changed.
Utterly and Completly.

While yours remains the same.

Too much to Bare

Too much to Carry

Too Long to HOLD


And you just stand there watching.

Everything Beautiful inside of me is taken.

Everything that framed my body has cracked.

Everything that once molded who I was and what I wanted to become has shattered.

Everything healthy inside of me has hollowed out and left completly.
And I feel dead inside.

So I curse my features,
       For they do not follow suit.

And I am broken.

But a solid mask is stuck in place,
masking my truths from any followers.

So I stay peaced together.

Hiding from my true form.


*So well that I hide from myself