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My anger is alive.
My anger is holy.
It is not destructive,
not evil,
not uncontrolled.
It does not consume—
it creates.
It creates justice.

It grows as a tree grows,
toward the light,
toward the truth.
It rises in strength,
in steady determination,
branches reaching wide,
casting shade over all
who seek its refuge.

My anger is breath—
filling my lungs
with the fire to endure,
to press on,
to press on.
My anger is courage.
It is the sword I raise,
the armor I wear
beside peace, beside truth.

My anger is holy.
My anger is alive.
My anger is my own.
It is mine.
I must have been born
like this—
right?

Born into this body,
this meat, this carcass,
this breathing, living
thing.

Born into light,
with light within,
for the light.

A light-bearer stands
in darkened fields.
And only there,
in shadows deep,
the light she carries
can be seen.

I walk toward her,
carrying this body,
carrying my questions,
searching for answers,
for relief,
for the source
of this unsettling light.

I must have been born this way—
right?
Did you know  
that clipped wings  
grow new feathers 

and soon enough,  
birds can soar
again.
Silly me—  
I believed that  
you Christian leaders, you,  
the ones that I knew,  
were different than those others.  

You would never  
cover up  
a scandal or abuse.  

No, not the Christian leaders I knew.  

Silly me,  
to believe such  
hopeful things—  
when I can see even those  
Christian leaders  
in red hats  
have built their stages  
on perverse facts-  
of abuse and ****  
and scandals too.  

Silly me, who thought they  
were different than you.
thirty years yet still
figuring out myself, I
relish in my strengths and
yet, I cannot face my
failings. when I look inside
the mirror, who do I see?

i'm a self destructive girl

prepared for you to leave,
my deepest insecurity, but
anymore than I can stop time
from pressing on, I cannot
stop the bomb from
ticking.
Sometimes I feel like a broken mirror, with how I distort myself. This is a fresh one, wrote it five minutes ago. Inspired by this song: https://youtu.be/ecRRxehRIDo?si=77_pa4iN42HlHIvx
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