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  Jun 2020 JaxSpade
Zia
I must have grown wings
captured within your arms
because I’m flying even when
my feet are planted next to yours
JaxSpade Jun 2020
Well the fishes swam...

                    You know
Those caramel turtles

I weighed a gram out

And you smoked the salmon
Or i should've said nuggets

Don't you know my heart aches
Every time i eat a milkyway

            I have type 2 diabetes
But i think about you anyway

Your like an abba zabba

    Well the fishes swam...
I love that peanut butter

I don't know
I guess now

Tuna sandwhiches
will have to do

The fishes swam
But you know

      I
Drowned
JaxSpade Jun 2020
Blue sky

You know why I cry
When the rain
Drops
And the clouds dark

Lightning strikes

I lay here in electricity
Shocked
I'm alive

When I look up
In that deep blue
Drop

I see clouds nine

And when the sun dies
The stars cry
In the blue blackened
Awe

I see the Gods
Thunder
Where the heavens part

Prepare the underworld
JaxSpade Jun 2020
Falling off
The edge of the world

Dropping down
To the emptiness
Into the void
Of lost consciousness

Falling

Off the edge of the world
Dropping down
To the emptiness
Into the void
Of lost consciousness

Falling

Off the edge of the world
Dropping down
To the emptiness
Into the void
Of lost consciousness

Falling down
Dropping
Off the edge of the world
Into the empty void
Of consciousness

Lost

Falling off
The worlds edge
Dropping down
To the emptiness

Falling off
The edge of the world

Dropping down
To the emptiness
Into the void
Of lost consciousness

Falling
Off

The edge of the world
I'm falling
Off the edge of the world
Into the empty void of nowhere

I'm a little scared
I don't know where I'm going
Or when I'll get there

Dropping down
Into the dark sullen unknown

To the emptiness
Where the void is endlessly
Long

Consciousness was lost
Where I found it
Off the edge of the world
I've fallen

Into the empty fall
Of consciousness
Lost

Falling off
The worlds edge
Dropping down
Into the emptiness
Of the bottomless

Pit
JaxSpade Jun 2020
I'm wide awake
Watching my ceiling
Stare back at me

It was saying all kinds of things
Telepathically

I couldn't believe
It was talking back to me

I'm wide awake
Staring at my ceilings face
It started talking to me
Felt like I was on some LSD

The things it was telling me
Filled my brain
And I'm wide awake

But now I'm not sure
Because my ceiling
Is talking back to me

No, I'm wide awake
I pinched myself
To make sure this was real
And I wasn't imagining

My ceiling was lecturing
I was staring at the white cottage cheese
Mentoring

I was there too long
Because then I heard the walls

And they starting closing in
Then I felt real small

And the floor started
Swallowing me whole

I didn't know where to go
So I jumped out the window
To my soul

And that's how I ended up
In this Institute
For the mentally gone

I'm wide awake
But my ceiling says

I should go back to sleep
  Jun 2020 JaxSpade
Katherine
You must let the pain visit
Open up and let it flow through
Inevitably, it will wash over you
So don’t avoid it, but never keep it
  Jun 2020 JaxSpade
Nat Lipstadt
”Well, my friends are gone and my hair is grey
I ache in the places where I used to play
And I'm crazy for love but I'm not comin' on.
I'm just payin' my rent every day in the Tower of Song”

Leonard Cohen lyric from The Tower of Song


§§§

this lyric hits, it’s a ten fingered cheeky ****** marking,
fits like a new white t-shirt, clean~perfect in every aspect,
I’ve just changed song to poetry, so nobody’s complaining

axiomatic, slept less a than three shambolic hours last nite,
don’t ask what I was doing or even a simple why, even the
vultures grew tired, helplessly hoping for solutions to start appearing

water pressure ok, poem spigot strong but the words desiccated,
it’s time to revisit roots, back to where I’ve come-begun, bury losses,
seek no consideration, write in isolation, a-quiet niche, a shhh! beach

my silent reverie owns me and the angels, biggest fans, just can’t
get enough, know their faith is strong, never proofing reads required,
content to wait till find my lost chords, comforts of only fresh truths

so arrivederci, until we meet again, when cadences have resumed,
rolling in unbroken, won’t need other’s words recirculating my blood,
till my slip sliding over, direction from arrows stabbing new openings

rented a storage unit in nearby woods, empty shelves greet ya with a
‘ready, willing, and able,’  many open arms looking for fulfilling, a job, that don’t even pay minimum wage, but the benefits are just fan-tastic


So:
should you spot a man ungainly wrought,
weighted down by a harpoon cross, resting,
‘pon on his cursed Cain-marked back, fingertips,
you need not move to the other side, or hide,
'tis only a make-believe poet, no longer believing,
with his recording device, seizing your rhapsodies
to rhyme with his own collected artifacts, your crinkly
smiles are his meat, his metier, his chosen career,
to be again a comfort caresser of your illusions into
a shapely sculpture of words be-loved, keeping-worthy,
tokens of a reexamined self worth, a new girth, leaner,
a celebration for the keeping, dug up with pail and shovel,
a best left hid on his treasured island, in a treasure chest, only his new-no-good-best-most-satisfying-new-no-good-best-mystifying-sati­sfying-cursing-muses-who-got-two-knee-on-my-soul-I’m-
howling...
­
Monday Jun 1, 2020
self-explanatory but if you don’t get it, then:

“there is no “better” in poetry

mine yours theirs, alive or not,

just gasps tears and blood
whimsical smiles and isles
cuts and burns of pained revelations,
hidden in fog,
that words try to delete away,
through the shrouded mists of
human tissues,
unconstrained by the
bounded shape
of the human cell,
our first, our own
self-imposed jail”
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