i had felt so calm

as if i was swimming in a lake
nearing two am on a summer night
the water still
warm from the sun
that had set hours prior

floating while gazing at the stars
with the moon illuminating
the subtle waves
rocking me into my sleep

a certain tranquility had
washed over the place

once crowded and populous
now as if any event of the past
had never been present

you could call it the end of times
at the start of a new day

i flew away
to an unusual reality
their skin had a faint glow
matching the vibrant hair

the personas were moving
while i was at a still
i caught myself smiling
through my numbness

as my conscious returned to me
the colours in my vision
turned dull once again

i think i would still enjoy
watching the sunsets with you
yet i am now not quite sure
on how to

i think it is safe to say
you are avoiding me
our paths are not colliding
any longer i see

i think i am better off
without you in my presence
but in these moments i wonder
what is the essence

forgive me for i have
belittled myself

the grand picture
has disappeared

i seek guidance
yet defy the system
that also just
injects me with treason

this is going to sound cheesy
but even if the sun would shine its brightest
the moon being at its fullest
and that together with a million stars
you would still be the brightest light
in this world and others

being willing to give up an eternity without you
just to spend a day in your presence

i remember you said that
you would travel the world for me

why did you leave me in a trip?

it was bad,
you know  

yet i still cannot leave you