Where are you,
for me to put my arm around from behind,
snake up between your ******* from behind,
my hand lightly holding your throat.
My face covered in your black hair,
scented of you,
my little spoon.

You - taller than me,
but I made you small
you fit so perfectly,
back to my naked chest,
just like I fit so perfectly
into you,
my little spoon.

I miss you,
I hope for you
someday to return embraced in my
arms of chicken wire,
brittle in this cool breeze blowing across
cracked earth that surrounds me, grey,
the only precipitant;
drops of suspiration from my eyes.

My world skips to slow motion
as I observe with the eyes
of a million unwoken promises,

and it hits the ground,

each drop splattering like a cloud devoured in a
pool of flies.
My body yearns, it aches for you
like a honey suckle longs to be
plucked,
torn in half
licked clean
by the tongue,
moist with desire,
that makes it home in the preoccupied body that will soon discard it,
barely noticed by the taste buds; it moves on to consume another.

Hope leaves me
as I realize
I miss you, but I don’t know who you are…

If only I could cleanse you,
sponge your body away and out into clarity,
find some emptiness to replace you with
the exit you took took the taken moments
further than I'd have liked them to go.

You bled,
I bleed,
help me staunch the bleeding,

and I don't know how to deal with your loneliness.
It's the one thing
you have left behind
with me.

Oh,
my smashing liquid crystal,
dilating pupils and drawing back the sheer curtains
to let the light in.

Oh,
my terror in the forest,
the light screams away in silence, echoing off the walls
of bark I shake in.

Oh,
my last breath,
bleeding in the tub, blood pours, black ink in water poured
from a shattering glass.

**** me *******,
shallow and cross,
angry and peaceful...
just take me away from the marks she has left here

...just ******* drive.

We lost each other in December,
The snow covered the tracks we left,
In the spring our ribcages bloomed,
The flowers grew wild and plenty,
It's summer now and I miss your heat,
I hope you come when the leaves fall

forget to tell her goodnight
after you have
made her cry,
she probably cried in her dark bedroom all alone
while she held her childhood teddy bear
close to her chest

tell her that it's all in her head
and that she is overreacting
when she is starting to break down
and tell her to stop when she starts
having problems getting air into her lungs

tell her you'll call her,
but instead go out and party all night
and make out with random strangers
who you find attractive in your drunken haze

The gunshots ring out from Baltimore,
I pray you are not tonight's target practice,
Young kings with concrete kingdoms,
Raging war against the parts of the sidewalk they cannot see,
Please stay safe another night

And as solitude embraces
my ghostly soul,
your memory soothes,
yet destroys,
me to the very core of every bone.
Many moon cycles
have passed
since those
well-calculated
beautifully words that
you spoke so mindlessly
faded away to the stars
and never were to be seen,
nor heard of,
but left an entire world shattered
into a million,
if not billion,
tiny little pieces.
All that you really did leave
were words that will forever
be engraved
in this sinful heart of mine,
that not even
the bread of your Lord
could ever make me forget,
nor His holy wine.
Believing once that your love
was different,
that it was a pure blessing
but ended up realizing that it was
the same treachery
God's most trusted angel
committed against Him.

You were my sinful beauty.