Do you know how hard it is
To write about love?
I have to find words
That others never dream of using
All to describe you

And I need to make it not sound
Like all the other ones
So I rack my brains
Reading dictionaries for days
No wait; Years actually

But every time I find some
I am outdone
By another who feels
The same way I do
For their own significant other

So I say the same words
other's do
But with my own emotions
And hope it gets through
while I scan dictionaries again
Hoping to find new words and synonyms
Just for you

I've placed my thoughts
To pen and paper
And each time
Incoherent nonsense
Stains it

Why is it that whenever
I try to invoke your name
And the emotions you spring
I am left gasping
And grasping
At the wrong words?

Why is it that whenever
I imagine serenity
I see you
Your lips my focus
Your gaze enticing
Both of us on our knees
With heart shaped keys
To our own tranquillity
It's meant to be
I know it

The ink in my pen
Has dried
But my mouth will have to do
What I'm trying to say
Is taboo
But I must say it
Now and not the next day

You are the most stunning of stars
In a desolate world
And I am truly honoured
To be part of yours

So I give you a piece of my essence
And hope to mix it with your own
Jesus, all I'm trying to say
Is that I love you...
Now what do we do?

I have revealed
A lot more of myself
Than any of you realise

I have torn chunks of skin
And revealed a canary in a cage for a heart
It chirps charming words at you
It dances for you
Before being plague with guilt and revulsion
And hiding away
It will come back I promise
At least, that's what I say?

I have scratched away deceit scrape by scrape
and shown only despair
That is still here
And doesn't look
Like it's going anywhere

I rip my fears like hangnails
and leave them to fester
Hoping one day that they heal
But I do not put a band-aid on
Because they will heal, Right?

I have revealed
A lot more of myself
Than any of you realise

But there is so much more
Hidden

But I can not tell you about them
It is forbidden

Until Next year

I've placed Boundaries
On my soul
And feel them
unbinding with each inhale

These Boundaries
On my soul
were a reminder
To be Harsh
To be Callous
Never falter
to cunning actions

These Limitations
Were a safe haven
Long ago
But now
My soul cries

It wants to slash them
and wreck them to oblivion
It wants the waves of the sea to gently rock it to sleep

It wants endearment
and nourishment
It wants to bathe in the moonlight's bliss
And feel passion reignite throughout

But I heed not it's calls
And tug on my limitations Tighter
Knowing that this is what's best
This
is
what's
best

The Screams
of my soul
Are what I deserve

No more
No less

I have shouted in to the void
Words that carry venom
that can **** me in seconds

Words that swirl and swirl
into flattery and mockery
And the void says nothing

Words that strip me bare
My lungs raw
The void flickers for but a moment
But still says nothing I want to hear

I continue to shout
I am wheezing,
fiending for an answer and outcome
I know will never exist

And yet, I persist
For I know these words I've shouted
will make sense
To you
hearing this

You are
Unfamiliar
Yet sinister

I am
Highly strung
Because of your mysterious vapours

You are
Bliss
Yet Terror

I am
Uncertain
and stray further

You are
A white-winged Angel
Yet with a hacksaw for a halo

I am
A Mortal
With a dire soul

You are
Used to these words
Yet you relish in them

I am
New to this tongue
And fumble Wordlessly

You and I are
Nothing Yet everything
In this peculiar territory.

I am made
In the molten flames
Of Olympus

But even now
I am stricken
With a sense of dread

Unease floods me
I could be standing
At the gates of Tartarus
And fighting Cerberus
With chopsticks

But this strong perturbation
Sticks to me
Like fog on a river meander

My skull is oozing icy crystals
Each thought heightened
And though I have never lost
I concede
To a single thought
No, an instinct:
I am prey
And there's nothing I can do.